11-14-11 Raw results and thoughts

Coverage and thoughts on the November 14, 2011 3 Hour episode of Raw Gets Rocked

The show starts with Michael Cole coming out and says that Jim Ross is there to take the Michael Cole challenge. He then says JR is the closest thing WWE has a cartoon float and he introduces him. JR comes out and Cole says that if JR wins all 3 challenges then he will get to be the announcer again. The first challenge is an arm wrestling contest. Cole does a lot of stalling doing jumping jacks and other idiocy while the referee tells him to get started. The contest starts and JR won right away. Cole then gets the mic and says the referee started too fast, but then he says that he gave up because JR’s breath smells like BBQ sauce and he couldn’t breathe. He then says that he will let the fans decide on who wins the second contest, a dance off. Cole goes first and makes a jackass of himself and then he asks JR if he forfeits. JR tells the music guy to cue the music and does his bit. Cole says that JR showed him something and he asks the fans for their vote and of course JR won that too. JR is winning 2-0. Cole then says that it has come down to the moment of truth and that both their careers are on the line. The third and final contest is a who weighs less contest. Yes there’s a scale in the ring. Cole wins this one and declares himself the winner of the challenge. CM punk’s music plays and he comes out and Cole goes nuts saying this is his moment and Punk has no business being there and Punk says that Cole’s time is up. He says that it was painfully obvious that he wasn’t going to let JR have his job back and that the whole challenge was a waste and says that JR is a better announcer than Cole. Punk then tells Cole that wants him to split and that between Cole, Ace & Del Rio this show is becoming unbearable (The show has been just that for the past few months). He then says that when the fans here Cole’s voice they change the channel and that he feels like he’s been hearing Cole for 6 hours. He then mentions that when he’s WWE Champion he will do all he can to make the show entertaining. Johnny Ace comes out and says that on his twitter page fans wanted to see the challenge and continues talking and says that tonight Punk will team with Big Show to face Alberto Del Rio & Mark Henry. Cole then says the pipe bomb blew up in punk’s face and he then demands Punk apologize to him. Punk punches him and locks him in the Anaconda Vice. This was beyond painful! The whole segment was a big waste just like Punk said. His promo was good and a lot of it true but the rest of it was crap!

Matt Striker is in the parking lot saying that tonight will be the big return. A limo pulls in and Mick Foley comes out and says he wouldn’t miss Rock’s return. This was ok.

Back to the show and Jim Ross is on commentary filling in for Michael Cole.

They show a Cody Rhodes promo saying that after the street fight 2 weeks ago he emancipated him.

Sin Cara & WWE Tag Team Champion Kofi Kingston vs. Intercontinental Champion Cody Rhodes & Hunico. Cody & Hunico win when Cody pins Kofi. This was a good match.

They show The Rock backstage.

Santino Marella is playing “WWE 12” AS The Rock facing Cena. Zack Ryder then comes in and asks him to sign the petition for him to get a U.S. Title. Santino does his comedy bit and says Rock is better than Cena and Ryder says that Cena’s better. Ryder then says that Rock & Cena will beat Miz & Truth at Survivor Series. Santino does Ryder’s Woo and signs the petition. This was a decent comedy segment.

Vickie Guerrero comes out and mentions that Christian got an ankle injury during the European tour (which is legit) and that he is out of Survivor Series. She then blames Teddy Long for making him compete. She then says that she spoke to Johnny Ace and about to announce who the 5^th guy is and then Dolph Ziggler comes out and makes the announcement that he will be on Team Barrett Sunday. He then says that he is taking on something that is more Cyborg than man tonight when he faces Mason Ryan.

Back to the show and Michael Cole comes out with Johnny Ace and Cole’s arm is in a sling. Ace then kicks raw out and Cole returns to commentary (why).

Mason Ryan vs. U.S. Champion Dolph Ziggler. Ryan wins by DQ when Vickie slaps him. This was awful. Dolph & Vickie head for the back, but John Morrison then comes out and throws Dolph back into the ring and Mason lays him out.

They show Mick Foley backstage and Ryder asks him to sign the petition and he and Foley do the fist pump and Woo bit and Foley signs the petition. This was ok.

Mick Foley comes to the ring and he talks about Rock & Cena teaming up at Survivor Series and hopes they team more than once and call themselves The Rock & Cena Connection. He says that he sees Cena as one of WWE’s greatest performers. He then has Cena come out. Cena music plays and he comes out (and gets booed in his home town of Boston). Cena says that he & Rock don’t need to be friends to be a tag team and that he asked Rock to be his partner because he is electrifying. Foley then says that his relationship with Cena is out of mutual respect. Cena says he respects Foley. Foley talks about how in 2006 Cena treated the locker with respect and that makes him a man. He then plugs his twitter and then says that the fans should show some appreciation for the great matches Cena’s had. That got booed. Foley then says that tonight he wants to be the thread that brings Cena & Rock together by doing a “John Cena, This is Your Life” segment. Cena’s not crazy about it, but they a show a Cena “life” video package. That got a mixed reaction. Foley then has Cena’s little league coach come out. The guy talks about how Cena struck in one of their ballgames. Cena says Foley is striking out with this bit (very true). He then has Bull Buchanan’s voice play of the speakers and they show a Cena rap from 2003. Bull Buchanan then comes out and says that Cena was the greatest tag team he ever had and that it was the greatest time of his life. He then puts over Cena and the crowd boos. He then mentions how he got released and divorced and that he lost all his money and his dog bit his arm. He then tells Cena that he ruined his life and walked out. Cena says that was worse than The Shock Master. Cena’s dad then comes out and talks like a ring announcer. He says that he wants to say something to the fans who chant Cena Sucks. He says that he doesn’t suck but the fans do (what really sucks is this segment). Cena than cuts his dad off and says this is awful (boy it sure is). Cena mentions that he never told the fans how to feel about him and that this whole segment wasn’t his life and that his life is being in the ring in front of the fans. He says that this segment is done. Foley then says that he’s bringing out more people and The Rock’s music hits and he comes out and Rock Bottoms Foley and walks to the back. Cena then checks on Foley. This was really idiotic!! I got nothing else to say about this!

Sheamus vs. Jack Swagger. Sheamus gets the pin. This was a solid match.

Zack Ryder is backstage with the Bellas asking him to sign his petition and Alberto and Ricardo come in and he says he has a meeting with Johnny Ace. The Bellas say that maybe they can hang out with him after Survivor Series. Ryder then tells them to hang out with him and they walk out. This was dumb.

They show a behind the scenes of Kelly Kelly’s Maxim photo shoot. BORING!

Kelly Kelly vs. Natalya. Kelly gets the quick pin. This was bad. Why do they always have Natalya lose?

Johnny Ace is backstage on the phone with Brodus Clay telling him that he will debut next week. Alberto & Ricardo come in and they talk about his match with Punk and Ace says that Punk can cause WWE a lot more trouble if he wins the WWE Title. Alberto says that Punk might not make it to Survivor Series and that he will be Champion longer than Ace will be GM. This was crap too! Brodus is better off not being on this show, but is this going to be a weekly bit?     

Matt Striker interviews The Miz & R-Truth and asks them a few questions and they don’t respond and then they walk out. That was fast.

CM Punk is backstage and Del Rio attacks him. This was ok.

CM Punk & Big Show vs. WWE Champion Alberto Del Rio & World Champion Mark Henry. Del Rio & Henry win when Del Rio pins punk. This was a solid match.  After the match Del Rio locks the Arm Breaker on Punk.  Big Show comes back in the ring and runs Del Rio off. Alberto holds up the belt on the stage.

Santino Marella comes out and says that it was earlier this year in this building is where he came close to winning the Royal Rumble. He then says that next time he returns to Boston he will be a champion. Kevin Nash then comes out and they go back and forth for a bit and Nash boots him. He then mentions that he was also in the Rumble and that he got the biggest ovation of the night and that HHH didn’t have the sense to hire him. He then Power Bombs Santino. This was crap too.

Wade Barrett comes out and says that on Smackdown he showed that Orton is the past and he is the present and future. He mentions how he beat both Orton & Sheamus and that he will beat Orton again right now.

Randy Orton vs. Wade Barrett. The match goes to a no contest when the other Survivor Series team mates come in. Orton gives Hunico an RKO and then Ryan press slams him out to the floor onto the others. The match was solid and the mini brawl was decent.

Time for The Rock. He comes out and does his usual posing on the turnbuckles. He talks about how he was sending tweets to his fans, training in the gym and filming a scene for a movie or whatever. He mentions that he says that he is now standing in the ring to say, “Finally The Rock has come back to Boston.” He then says that Survivor Series is in 6 days and not right now. He then tells Foley that he loves him, but there was no way he was going to let the segment from earlier continue. He says that right now is why he is the most electrifying man in entertainment. He then mentions his twitter and how his stuff gets trended more than anybody’s. He says that he came tonight to make sure Raw gets Rocked and that he is not waiting 6 days and that he will deliver an awesome ass whooping to Awesome Truth right now. The Miz & R-Truth then come out and Miz does his really bit and Truth says that if Rock thinks he’s doing anything to them that he’s the most delusional man in entertainment and that Raw gets Rocked is a joke. He then says that every time they’re on the show it gets and Miz says, “Awesome.” Miz says they don’t care about Rock’s day and that they want to leave him a bloody mess. Truth says they can do that right now. Miz says it won’t because they don’t care what Rock or the fans want. It is about what they want and that is to make history at Survivor Series. Miz then says that Sunday, “Rock gets beat.” Truth says, “And that’s the truth.” John Cena’s music plays and he comes out and rags on Rock for bringing messages by satellite. Rock then rags on Cena about rising above the hate. Cena then says that they’ll be a team Sunday and that if Rock’s ego gets in the way…Miz then says that he is sick of this being The Rock and Cena show. Then he says that after Survivor Series when they get done with them it will never be forgotten. Truth says that if Little Johnny & Little Rocky want to bicker for all the Little Jimmies they can have a blast and they will see them Sunday. Rock says that right now, “boots to asses” and Rock and Cena attack Truth & Miz. Rock gives Truth a Rock Bottom. Cena then goes for the AA on Miz but Rock yanked Miz off his shoulders and gave Miz a Rock Bottom. Rock then walks up the ramp and does Cena’s you can’t see me gesture and they have a stare down to end the show. This was just as bad as the rest of the show. Rock and Cena are teaming Sunday and the guys they’re facing get pushed to the background AGAIN! Why!?

This was a really painful show on the whole. They didn’t do much for the Survivor Series build up and there were so many idiotic segments! Raw got Rocked? I don’t think so; Raw continued its fall to Rock bottom (yes pun intended)! This show was complete dreck! There was nothing memorable on this show! It felt really long and dragged out!