4-12-12 Impact results and thoughts

Coverage and thoughts on the April 12, 2012 episode of Impact

The show starts with Eric Bischoff coming to the ring. The fans chant “you suck” and boo him. Then Eric says that Hulk Hogan and Garrett are feeling good about themselves. They feel like they’re in control, but what they don’t get is that the name Eric Bischoff will live on. He says that when Hulk Hogan came out and question his leadership ability last week and Eric says that he managed to put together a team for Lethal Lockdown. He welcomes his team. Team Eric is mad of, Bully Ray, Christopher Daniels, Frankie Kazarian & Gunner. Ray then gets the mic and asks the fans if they know who Eric is. Ray says that he is proud to go to war for Eric. Ray says that as great a guy as Eric is he made one mistake. He says that the mistake is his son Garrett. Eric says he knows what the stakes are at Lockdown. He talks about how there will be a best of 3 series to see who will have the 1 man advantage. Then he says that Gunner is ready for anybody. Eric challenges someone to come out and Garrett does. Garrett says that he hopes Eric has chosen wisely. Then he says he has his team. Then he says that he has 1 guy on his team who wants some action right now. Ken Anderson comes out. He will face Gunner next. This was a typical Bischoff opening segment. I’m not into the whole Bischoff saga and really hope to God this ends Sunday.

Ken Anderson vs. Gunner in a best of 3 series match. Gunner wins by DQ when Anderson continues to stomp Gunner in the corner and the referee calls for the bell. This was a decent match. I thought the DQ ending was lame tough. Team Eric gets the first win.

Eric Young is backstage in a blue tux admiring himself and the Joseph Park comes in. Then of course he asks Young if he’s seen Abyss. Young rambles and Joseph tells him to think. Young says that he was with that Immortal group. Then Joseph gives him card.

The Motor City Machine Guns are in the ring. Alex Shelley says that it’s about how big his heart is. Sabin says that they’re coming for the tag titles. Shelly says they’ve been teaming 6 years while the champs have only been teaming 6 months. He says that they’ve competed all over and have beaten Beer Money & Team 3D multiple times. Then he says that at Lockdown they will be the new tag team champions. Then Magnus & Samoa Joe come out. Magnus says that the guns are one of the impressive teams ever and that coming back from their injuries takes serious guts. He says they have his respect. Then he mentions that at Lockdown the best team will meet to see who deserve to be the tag champions. Magnus says they can go right now. Then Mexican America come out and Anarquia says that they were tag champions for 6 months. He says they got one thing to say. Then the brawl starts. Both teams take out Mexican America. Then they face off. This was a good segment. I liked the promos from Shelly, Sabin & Magnus. This match should be good.

X Division Champion Austin Aries vs. Christopher Daniels in a best of 3 series match. Aries gets the pin to tie up the series. This was a really good back and forth match.

The steel cage is being set up and Jeff Hardy come out. He says that this all started when Kurt Angle cost him the world title and it will end in the cage. He says that there’s no escape for Angle. Jeff says they will make history and hurt each other Sunday. Jeff then says it’s inevitable and he loves it. This was a good short promo.

James Storm promo backstage with the 2 country guys and Storm says that Roode will find out why Nashville is Storm’s town. Then they both talk. This feud has been good but I have no idea why they have these 2 country guys in there. I know they sang James Storm’s theme song but having them there is still odd.

Back to Eric Young and Sarita & Rosita come in. He says that nothing will go wrong with his wedding. Then they ask if he’s thought this through and Eric says he will marry ODB. This was typical Eric Young goofiness.

Time for the Eric Young-ODB wedding in the cage. Young comes out in his tux and has glasses on. They have the Knockout tag titles in the ring too. Then ODB comes out. The cage door is locked and the ceremony begins. The priest says that the cage is symbolic because of strength and commitment. Then he says that Young & ODB have a video to show. They show the video recapping they’re saga. This is idiotic! They do the whole wedding vows bit. Young says his first and it’s typical Eric Young comedy. Then ODB says her vows and she says a lot of goofy comedy too. The priest then does the “if anyone objects” bit. Then Mexican America’s music plays and Rosita & Sarita come out. Sarita says they object. Then Rosita takes her robe off and starts dancing while Sarita is saying she could be his. Then Sarita does the same and Rosita says Eric doesn’t know what he’s missing. ODB says that she gets they she hasn’t got what they do, but they haven’t got what she has. Then she takes her dress off. Then Young says that ODB is perfect for him. He says that he knows how to make the wedding perfect. Then he takes his suit off. UGH! Then ODB tells the priest to take his suit off too. He does and then they do the “do you take” bit. Young says absolutely and ODB says oh yeah BAM! They priest then says they’re married. This was terrible!!

Ric Flair is backstage with team Eric and he tells Bully Ray that they need him to win. Ray gets psyched up. His match is next.

They show Bobby Roode backstage with his security saying he’s ready for his face off with James Storm. Then he says that on Sunday it will be personal. This was a good promo.

AJ Styles vs. Bully Ray in a best of 3 series match. Ray gets the pin after hitting AJ with his chain for team Eric to get the 1 man advantage at Lockdown. All the team members from each team are at ringside. Of course a brawl starts. Then Ray sneaks his chain in and hits AJ with it for the pin. Then Hulk Hogan comes out and he says that at Lethal Lockdown it won’t be 4 on 4. It will be 5 on 5. He gives Eric 3 minutes to name the 5^th guy on his team and thy go to commercial. Back from commercial and Hulk and Team Garrett are in the ring. Hulk tells him to say who the 5^th man is. Eric says that he knows Hulk will be the 5^th guy and that they can take him. Eric says that he will be the 5^th guy on his team. Then Hulk tells Eric that he won’t be the 5^th guy for Team Garrett. Hulk tells him that he let Garrett know ahead of time this would be 5 on 5. Then Garrett does the RVD pose and Rob Van Dam comes out. This was good. I liked the match. The post match stuff was ok but I thought it went a bit long. The also didn’t need to have a commercial in there.

They show a James Storm-Bobby Roode video package with Roode saying that he carries Storm. He says that at Lockdown he will prove to Storm why he is the World Champion. Then we get comments from Storm. He says that it took 10 years to build TNA. He then says that with 1 bottle a 4 year friendship was destroyed. He says that in 3 days it ends. This was ok.

Mickie James & Velvet Sky vs. Madison Rayne & Knockouts Champion Gail Kim. Mickie & Velvet win when Velvet pins Gail. This was a decent match.

Time for the James Storm-Bobby Roode face off. Roode come to the ring with his security guys. Storm says that they’ve been yelling at each other for the past few weeks. He mentions that they were 4 time tag champions and the longest reigning champion in TNA history. He mentions how they traveled the world and entertained a lot fans. Roode says they had a lot of success together as Beer Money. He says that it was one of the proudest moments of his life. Then he mentions that there is another proud moment from last year. He mentions them both being in the Bound For Glory Series. Roode talks about their semi-final matches and Roode mentions that he won his match but Storm lost his. Then he mentions challenging for the World Title at Bound For Glory and James Storm sat in the back and did nothing. Storm says that he was watching and he remembers Roode got beat. Storm says that the next week he beat the in record time that beat Roode. Roode says he remembers because 2 weeks later he beat Storm for the World Title. Roode says that was the night he became the “it factor” of wrestling. Storm says that was the night Roode hit him with a Beer bottle and destroyed their friendship. Roode tells him they were never friends. Roode says that 10 years ago they hated each other. Roode than says that Beer Money was a success because of their passion for the business. Then Roode says that Storm has been jealous of him. Storm says where he comes from friends and family still mean something. He says that Bobby does this for the money while he does this for the fans. Then Storm says that in 3 days they will beat the living s**t out of each other in front of his fans. Roode says that he doesn’t care about the fans or Storm’s family. Then Storm says that Roode will need a miracle to walk out of the cage. Roode says that in 3 days Storm will be the guy that will need all the luck he can get. Then he says with Storm’s history he doesn’t have any luck. They go nose to nose with really intense looks to end the show. This was a good promo too. I thought both guys did a great job.

I thought this was a good show overall. The opening segment with Eric Bischoff wasn’t great but I liked the Storm-Roode face off. I also liked the Aries-Daniels match. That was the highlight of the show. The Machine Guns cut good promos too and aside from Mexican America I thought the face with the Guns and Magnus & Joe was good also. AJ & Bully Ray also had a good match but I thought the post match stuff went a bit long. Especially with the commercial thrown in there. The Eric Young-ODB wedding was the typical kind of dumb comedy we get from them. Jeff Hardy’s promo was good and short and I thought Ken Anderson & Gunner had a solid match too. This was definitely a good go home episode for Lockdown.

4-10-12 Live Smackdown results and thoughts

Coverage and thoughts on the April 10, 2012 Live Blast From The Past episode of Smackdown

The show starts with a replay of the Daniel Bryan-AJ promo from last week.

They announce that Daniel Bryan will be on Piper’s Pit tonight.

The actual show starts with Gene Okerland in the ring. He says they will blast off with a favorite of his and he introduces Sheamus. Sheamus says it’s an honor to be in the ring with a legend like Mean Gene. He says that honor means a lot. He says that last week after his match he didn’t follow the code of honor and he apologizes to Chad Patton, the other referees and to the world. He says that some people learn from their mistakes the easy way while others learn the hard way. Sheamus says that he learned the hard way. Then Johnny Ace comes out and the reshow the clip of the end of the Sheamus-Alberto Del Rio match. Ace rags on Sheamus and says that he wants Sheamus to publicly apologize to the Chad Patton. Sheamus says he did. Ace says he didn’t hear him. Sheamus apologizes again. Then Ace says that he wants Sheamus to apologize to the other referees. Sheamus says that he did that too. Ace again says that he didn’t hear hi. Sheamus apologizes again. Then Ace says that Sheamus needs to apologize to the world. Sheamus does again. Then Ace says that’s not good enough and Sheamus is on permanent probation and that if he kicks a referee on purpose or not he will fire him. Then he says he will fine Sheamus $500,000. Then he tells Sheamus that he will face Daniel Bryan & Alberto Del Rio in a tag match tonight. Johnny says that Sheamus’ partner will be Mean Gene. This was a terrible segment.

Randy Orton is backstage and his dad Bob comes in and wishes him luck against Mark Henry.

Randy Orton vs. Mark Henry. They show Bob Orton watching on a monitor backstage. The match goes to a no finish. Kane’s pyro goes off and he shows up on the Tron. Kane says that he had to beat Orton at WrestleMania to become the monster he was and he did that. Then Kane says that last week Orton showed that he can hang with him. Then he says that it would be shame if this ended now. Kane says that he is having so much fun. The kind of fun that the whole family can enjoy. Then they show Bob Orton unconscious with Kane kneeling over him. Orton runs to the back and looks for Kane. Randy finds his dad and then Kane hits Randy with a pipe. Kane says that he is a sucker for family reunions. This was mediocre. I’m not really into this story line. Also they still want us to forget that Mark Henry took out Kane last summer! Why do they do that?

They show Tony Atlas and the Million Dollar Man watching the show backstage on the monitor. Then Pat Patterson Hillbilly Jim come by.

Before the next match this guy Benny Camer starts to speak but then Ryback comes out. Why are they having these unknown wrestlers speak before Ryback comes out? Also why do they have others watching backstage being idiots?

Ryback vs. Benny Camer. Ryback gets the pin. This was a pointless squash.

They show Health Slater and Tyson Kidd backstage and Slater wants to team with Tyson to face the Usos. Then Heath says that he found a Hall of Famer to manage them. Heath then mentions that the manager told him that he could be the next Honky Tonk Man. Tyson is curious why Heath thinks the Honky Tonk Man comparison is good. Then Jimmy Hart comes in and says that Heath & Tyson are a winning combination. Whatever. This was idiotic. Why would Tyson Kidd, who is the baby face team with Heath Slater who is a heal?

Mick Foley comes out to do commentary.

The Usos vs. Tyson Kidd & Heath Slater. The Usos win when Jimmy pins Slater. This was a solid match. Jimmy Hart was screaming at Mick Foley through his Megaphone and then Mick pulled Mr. Socko out and Jimmy ran. After the match Foley gave Jimmy the Mr. Socko treatment. This was fine for what it was.

Time for Piper’s Pit. Piper gets in the ring and the fans chant his name. He says that tonight he has a man named Daniel Bryan. He says that Daniel is a man that lost the World Title at WrestleMania in 18 seconds and that he blamed it on his girlfriend. Then he has the guys in the truck replay the Daniel-AJ promo from last week. Piper then introduces Daniel Bryan. Daniel comes to the ring doing his “Yes” bit. The fans chant yes too. Piper says that Daniel seems very happy for a guy who lost the World Title in 18 seconds. Daniels says that he just met with Johnny Ace and he gave Daniel his World Title rematch. Then Daniel says that this match will clearly show who the better man is. He says that he wants to make Sheamus tap out as well as pin him. Then he says that he can do both because the match at Extreme Rules will be 2/3 falls. Then he says that AJ won’t be anywhere in sight. Piper than says that AJ is in the building and he likes AJ. He says that this is his show and he has AJ come out. AJ thanks Piper for being on Piper’s Pit. Then she says that Daniel is a good person deep down. Piper says that at Piper’s Pit you leave the politically correct answers at the door. Then he mentions what Daniel said to her last week. Then AJ says that it’s her fault. She says that she made a mistake at WrestleMania and she is sorry. Then she says that she can make it up to Daniel. Piper says that he’s been watching her since she started. He mentions that she’s strong and smart. He says that all Daniel is doing is using AJ. Daniel says that he’s had enough. Then Daniel tells AJ that if she meant what she said she will leave the ring. Piper tells her not to listen to him. AJ walks out of the ring and up the ramp. Daniel was about to leave but Piper says that he’s not finished with him. Piper brings up Daniel’s new “Yes” shirt and then mentions that he has 3 daughters. Then Piper tells him a few “Nos.” Piper tells Daniel not to tell a lady to shut up or yell at her. He also says not to use a woman as a human shield because that’s what a coward does. Then he says that he will watch Sheamus kick Daniel’s head off his shoulders not once but twice. Daniel says that at Extreme Rules the fact that he is better than Sheamus will slap him and everyone across the face. Then he slaps Piper and heads up the ramp doing his “Yes” bit again. This was a decent segment. Daniel’s promo was good like usual and Piper’s was decent too. I’m not sure what they’re doing with AJ being so in love with Daniel that she’s being brainwashed by him.

Great Khali, Natalya & Alicia Fox vs. Drew McIntyre & The Bella Twins. Khali, Natalya & Alicia wins when Alicia pins Nikki. Drew walks out and says that he’s better than this. Then Alicia got the 3 count. This was pointless. Then Mae Young’s music plays and she comes out. Khali gets on his knee and Mae kisses him. UGH!! Why did they stick Natalya in this dreck!?

They show Damien Sandow talking about sophistication has become a lost art. He rags on Twitter. Then he says that it is his destiny to be the fans light. Good promo from Sandow.

Time for the Raw rebound.

They show Mean Gene & Sheamus backstage and Gene says that he doesn’t like their chances. Sheamus says they probably won’t win but won’t let Ace get the satisfaction of sweating this out. Sheamus says if they survive tonight the drink is on him. Gene asks did he says “If”. Then Sheamus says that they will have a drink to remember or a drink to forget. This was ok.

Hacksaw Jim Duggan comes to the ring for a match.

Hacksaw Jim Duggan vs. Hunico. Hunico wins by DQ. Hacksaw has Sgt. Slaughter come out to even the odds against Hunico & Camacho. Hacksaw hit Hunico with the 2 X4 and the ref called for the bell. Then Slaughter locked Hunico in the Cobra Clutch. This was ok for what it was. Hunico’s a jobber but it was kinds nice to see Hacksaw & Slaughter on the show.

Cody Rhodes comes to the ring and says that this show has been a waste. He says they should turn to the future. A future where the legends don’t hog the spotlight from the young guys. Then Dusty’s music hits and he comes out. Time for a father and son segment. Cody says this doesn’t concern Dusty. Dusty says it does. Dusty says that Cody is the most naturally talented guy since Shawn Michaels but he poked a grizzly bear in Big Show. Cody says that Dusty is embarrassing him and they can talk about this in the back. Then Big Show comes out and does a Dusty impersonation. Show says that he won’t show the clip he’s been showing tonight. He will show the real Cody Rhodes. The play Cody’s old grooming tips. Show, talking like Dusty again says that’s embarrassing and then walks to the back. Cody walks up the ramp while Dusty danced in the ring. This was just as dumb as it’s been the other times. I thought we were going to get a father-son promo but that didn’t happen. I hope they don’t have Big Show do this to Cody all the time. It’s getting old!

They have Howard Finkel on the stage to introduce Mean Gene & Sheamus. Nice to see The Fink. The guy is the greatest ring announcer ever!

World Champion Sheamus & Mean Gene Okerlund vs. Daniel Bryan & Alberto Del Rio. Sheamus & Gene win when Sheamus pins Daniel. Daniel, Alberto & Ricardo surround Gene and Ricardo was going to hit him but then Piper and the other legends come out. After the match the legends throw Ricardo around and Sheamus then gave him a Brogue Kick. Then the legends & Sheamus celebrate. Then Michael Cole gets the mic and gets in the ring and says that they have to get to get back to the retirement home so they should have their picture taken. They go after Cole and Cole says that he was kidding. Then Pat Patterson hits him. The celebration continues and this ends the show. This was a typical “give the legends their moment bit.” It wasn’t great but it wasn’t awful either.

I thought this was a crappy show on the whole. There really wasn’t anything memorable on here. Piper’s Pit was good and It was also nice to see Howard Finkel on the show but the rest of the show felt just there for the most part. These live Smackdown shows are usually weak and this sure was a weak show.   

4-9-12 Raw results and thoughts

Coverage and thoughts on the April 9, 2012 episode of Raw

The show starts with clips of the new (and probably awful) 3 Stooges movie.

They announce that Mark Henry will challenge CM Punk for the Title.

The actual show kicks off with Johnny Ace & David Otunga coming to the ring. Johnny says that he is going to introduce the new face of WWE. Johnny says that this guy doesn’t care about the fans. He then says that this is someone who will carry the banner for years to come. Then he says we will look at the impact this man has made. They reshow the John Cena promo from last week where Brock Lesnar came out and gave Cena the F5. Johnny than welcomes the man who will face John Cena at Extreme Rules, Brock Lesnar. They’re really rushing into this. Brock comes out and thanks Johnny for having the wisdom to bring legitimacy back to WWE. Then John Cena’s music hits and he comes out. He comes to the ring with a smile on his face (why would he be smiling after getting flattened last week?). After waiting for a bit, Cena says something and then he slaps Lesnar and they start to go at it. Then security and other wrestlers come out to break it up. Cena was bleeding from the mouth. He goes back after Lesnar and the wrestlers try to pull them apart. Then the other wrestlers drag Brock out of the ring. Then Cena asks someone if he looks alright since he’s bleeding. This was a decent opening segment. I liked that they had Cena come out and slap Lesnar. When he came out with that smile of on his face I was dreading one of his cartoon like promos but thankfully we were spared that. I thought the pull a part brawl was good. I do think however that they’re having the Cena-Lesnar match way too soon.

Johnny Ace & David Otunga are backstage with Teddy Long and Johnny blames Teddy for what happened for not being able to contain Cena. He wants Long to go to Cena for an explanation. Then Eve Torres comes in and says that she hasn’t had a chance to speak to him since WrestleMania. Johnny says that they can have a one on one meeting. Then Eve tells Johnny that he has her cell number and he should call her. This was idiotic.

Time for the Funkasauris and Santino Marella is with him. NO!

U.S. Champion Santino Marella & Brodus Clay vs. Jack Swagger & Dolph Ziggler. Santino & Brodus win when Brodus pins Dolph. This was ok.

The Miz is backstage with Johnny Ace and Johnny says that tonight’s been a little crazy, but he has big plans for him. He tells Miz they will talk next week. Then Teddy Long comes and Ace chews him out and asks where Cena is. Then Cena comes in and talks about what Ace said at the start. Then he says that Ace brought Brock in because he wants to put Cena out of business. Then he says that he doesn’t care about the blood, he wants a match and he wants Johnny to pick his opponent. Johnny tells Long to tell David Otunga that he will face Cena. This was terrible too. This whole “heal running the show” bit is really old.

Santino asks Tyler Reks & Curt Hawkins if they’ve seen the “stooges”. They haven’t. Then he asks a couple of guys on their laptops. This was really dumb. Why are acting like these guys who are playing the stooges are the actual 3 stooges!? I find this really idiotic!

Back from commercial and Santino is still looking for the “stooges” and he runs into Kane. Santino does some Curly stuff and then runs off. More idiocy.

R-Truth vs. Cody Rhodes. Truth gets the pin. Big Show’s music plays and he comes out. Then they reshow the clip from last week when Show came out and caused Cody to lose to Kofi Kingston. Then Truth got the 3 count. This was stupid too. I hope to God they don’t do this with Cody every week.

More Santino idiocy backstage and he sees a crate that says fragile on it. He pries it open and the “stooges” come out. They do some stooges stuff and Santino asks what they have planned for tonight. “Larry” says he was hoping to catch up with the Divas. Then “Moe” has Santino show him the cobra. This was weird. Seeing these guys act like the stooges was really odd.

Yoshi Tatsu vs. Lord Tensai. Tensai wins when the referee stops the match. This was a squash. Afterwards Tensai locks the claw on Yoshi. The fans chanted Albert during this. That was funny.

They replay the CM Punk-Chris Jericho segment from last week.

CM Punk comes to the ring and gets the mic. He says he wanted to break the last week’s worth of science. He says that straight edge isn’t something everybody gets. He says it’s a personal choice and it wasn’t made to fit in but because it is a way of life. He says that the reason he is straight edge he has kept close to the vest because it’s no one’s business and he feels who cares? Then Punk says that he said he would make to the top of WWE because he is the best wrestler in the world. The fans chant CM Punk. Then Punk mentions Jericho and talks about how he was trying to get into Punk’s head. Then he talks about the stuff Jericho brought up about his family. Then Punk says that at WrestleMania he made Jericho tap out. Then he says that Jericho took one step too far last week. He mentions Jericho breaking the bottle over his head. Punk says that he wasn’t thinking how badly hurt he was but he was thinking that he smelled just like his father used to. He mentions more about his dad and then Jericho shows up on the Tron. He asks Punk if he’s still hung over. Jericho says that Punk has to admit that booze is taking control of his life. He says that when the fans look at him they don’t see a World Champion but a loser. Then Jericho says that last week he forced Punk to understand what it was like to be CM Drunk. Punk tells Jericho that he can’t break him and tells Jericho that every bad memory he has he will use against Jericho. Punk then says that this is no longer about him being the best in the world but about him kicking Jericho’s ass. This was a good promo too. Both guys were really good in their delivery. Then Mark Henry comes out for his Title match.

WWE Champion CM Punk vs. Mark Henry for the Title. Henry wins by DQ when Punk hits him with a monitor. Afterwards Punk was going to throw the monitor on Henry but Chris Jericho’s music hit. Punk got distracted and then Mark Henry beats down Punk and gives him 2 World’s Strongest Slams. Jericho comes to the ring with some beer cans. After Henry leaves Jericho opens one and was about to pour it on Punk but Punk attacked him. Then Jericho gave Punk the Code Breaker. Then Jericho gets a few cans and pours both on Punk telling him to drink it in. Then referees come in and try to get Jericho out of the ring. Punk crawls on the ring mat all soaked and Jericho yells to him to have some more. Then he gives Punk a second Code Breaker. Then Jericho get the belt and raises it in the air. This was good stuff. Jericho is really good at playing the dastardly heal. Punk does a great job too of course. This feud has really been good.

Zack Ryder vs. Alberto Del Rio. Del Rio wins by submission. This was short.

They show the “stooges” backstage and “Curly” has an idea. We’ll see them live next.

Time for the fake 3 stooges. “Moe” and “Larry” come to the ring. They get booed. Then Real American hits and “Curly” comes out dressed like Hulk Hogan. Then “Curly” starts to talk like the Hulkster and promotes the new movie. Then Kane’s pyro hits and he comes out. He gets in the ring and stares down the “stooges” and has his pyro go off. “Moe” and “Larry” run to the back. “Curly” Hulks up and Kane choke slams him. This was terrible!!

Josh Mathews is backstage with Mark Henry and asks if Henry can explain this. Then they show Henry giving Punk 2 World’s Strongest Slams. Henry says that last week he beat Punk by count out and this week he beat him by DQ. Then he says that he talked to Johnny Ace and he will face Punk for the title next week in a No DQ, No count out match.

Josh Mathews asks Brock Lesnar if he’s proud to be back in WWE. Brock says that he’s proud of everything that he does. Then he talks about his WWE and UFC runs. He says that a guy like Cena thinks he’s at the top. He says that he isn’t here to make any friends. He is a war machine. Then he says that fans are proud to have him back.   

They recap the Undertaker-Triple H match from WrestleMania. They show clips and have comments from other wrestlers. The comments from the talent mentioning how historic it was were good. I thought the still shots were a good touch too.

John Cena vs. David Otunga. Cena wins by submission. This wasn’t much. Afterwards Brock Lesnar comes out and low blows Cena from behind. Then Lesnar gives Cena the F5. Lesnar stands over Cena and Johnny Ace applauds him. Then Lesnar walks up the ramp while Cena sells the F5 to end the show.

This week’s show was really weak I thought. The pull a part brawl with Cena & Lesnar at the start of the show was good. The Cena-Otunga match wasn’t much. Lesnar hitting Cena with another F5 was ok. When Cena came out for his match why was he all smiles after Lesnar busted him open? This is what makes fans boo Cena. The way he no sells stuff like that. They should have had him run to the ring and beat the crap out of Otunga. The Punk-Jericho stuff was good too. I thought that the promo went a little long but it was good. This is one of the better WWE storylines. The Punk-Henry match wasn’t much. This continued the storyline with Jericho more than it was a match. Henry’s promo saying that he will face Punk in a No DQ no count out match was good also. The “stooges” stuff was idiotic. The less said about that the better. Overall I thought this was a lame show. 

4-6-12 Smackdown results and thoughts

Coverage and thoughts on the April 6, 2012 episode of Smackdown

The show starts with David Otunga coming out on the stage and after a long winded introduction welcomes Johnny Ace. Johnny comes out and he & Otunga walk to the ring. He talks about how thrilled he is to be the Smackdown GM and that Smackdown will be a better show under his control. Then he says hello to Booker T.  Then he says that he won’t abuse his power but will use it for the fans. He mentions that this a new era and that era is “People Power.” I’m already tired of hearing that slogan! Then he asks Teddy Long to come out so he can thank him for his years of being GM of Smackdown. Long comes to the ring and the fans chant his name. Johnny says that he knows the last few days have been crazy for Teddy after what happened at WrestleMania. Long cuts him off and says that “being out of a job has 1 benefit.” It gives the freedom to tell Johnny where to go. Long than says that isn’t going to complain about what happened at WrestleMania. He says what’s done is done and he is living with the results. He mentions that everyone told him he was crazy for showing up on Smackdown but he says that he couldn’t just walk away. He says that being the Smackdown GM was the greatest job of his life. Then he thanks the fans and says that they hope they as much fun watching Smackdown as he did running the show. Then he says to the fans, “till we meet again, can I get a holla, holla, holla?” The fans cheer him. Long thanks the fans and then his music plays. Before Long leaves the ring Johnny tells Teddy that he isn’t finished. Johnny tells Teddy that he would like offer him a job. Long says that needs a job but it won’t be working for him. Long tells Johnny to take his job and shove it. Johnny then says that he knows Teddy is a proud man but he’s forgetting something, and that something has to do with his grandchildren’s college education. Long asks what he’s talking about and Johnny he will let David Otunga explain it. Otunga mentions that a few years ago the WWE Board of Directors established a college fund for his 3 grandchildren. Otunga says that he was reviewing the paperwork and that the fund is technically controlled by whoever is the Smackdown General Manager. Long says that they’re going too far and tell them not to mess with his grandchildren. Then Johnny says that Teddy should take the job he’s offering him so that his grandchildren’s college funds will be safe. Then Ace says that he gives Teddy his word and that his word is golden. Then Ace offers his hand to Long. Then Ace pulls his hand away and says that there is one thing that he needs Teddy to do and is to tell everyone that Johnny is better than he is. Long reluctantly says that Johnny the better man. Ace says he couldn’t hear him and Long says it again. Then Johnny tells Teddy to head to the back and start working on his job. Long asks what his job is and Ace tells him that he hasn’t figured that out yet but there’s a lot of things on Smackdown that he needs. He tells Long to go to the back. Teddy leaves the ring and Johnny says ”let’s hear it for Teddy Long.” As long walks up the ramp all upset, Ace tells the fans that they have a great show tonight. He says that Randy Orton will face Kane in a WrestleMania rematch and the match will be No DQ. Then he says that R-Truth will face David Otunga. Then Otunga says something to Johnny and then Johnny says that the Truth-Otunga match will be a handicap match because Truth will face David Otunga & Mark Henry. Then Mark Henry comes to the ring and the match is next. This was a crappy way to start the show. Johnny Ace is beyond boring and the whole “heal is in charge of everything” story has been done to death!

R-Truth vs. Mark Henry & David Otunga. Henry & Otunga win when Otunga gets the pin. Mark Henry pounded on Truth most of the match and then gave him the World’s Strongest Slam. Then David Otunga made Henry tag him in so he could get the pin. This was crap. They also showed Abraham Washington (Or A.W. as he’s now being called)watching the match backstage on a monitor. Then Kane’s pyro goes off and he comes out. He makes his way to the ring and Josh Mathews says that his match with Randy Orton is next. THAT WAS IT!? Mark Henry took out Kane last summer and we’re supposed to forget that ever happened!? Having Kane come to the ring while Henry (the guy who took him out) and Otunga still in the ring made no sense!

Randy Orton vs. Kane in a No DQ Match. Orton gets the pin. This was a solid brawl and better than their WrestleMania match.

They reshow the Sheamus-Alberto Del Rio promo from Monday.

Before the next match Lillian announces one of the guys who be wrestling next, Barry Stevens. Then Stevens takes the mic and he talks while they show Hunico, Camacho, Kaitlyn, The Usos, Alicia Fox & Derrick Bateman watching backstage and talking throughout his promo. They go back to him and he says that the fans are the rudest people on Earth. Then the returning Skip Sheffield comes out using his new name, Ryback.

Ryback vs. Barry Stevens. Ryback gets the pin. They showed the same talent watching the match. This was stupid. Why have an unknown guy come out and cut a promo and have all these lower level talents backstage mocking him. Just f’n stupid!! For Hunico & Camacho to do that is one thing since they’re the heals but the rest of them are baby faces and it made no sense!! Idiotic bit!!

They show Daniel Bryan and AJ backstage as they make their way to the ring.

Daniel Bryan & AJ come out and Daniel says that the positive to this week is that he’s had a chance to think. He’s thought about how everything was going right and then it all went wrong. Then he says that he figured out the moment he went off the tracks. The crowd gets to him and he doesn’t speak. Then AJ takes the mic and tells Daniel that he is a great wrestler and a great person. She says that she isn’t the only one who thinks that. The fans chant “Yes.” She tells him to listen to the fans and remember all the yes that everyone had for him at WrestleMania. Then she mentions the fans were also chanting “yes” on Raw when wasn’t even in the ring. Then the fans chant “Daniel Bryan.” Then AJ tells him that they are all here to support him. Then Daniel takes the mic and asks if the fans are supporting him. They chant “Yes” again. Daniel then says it feels more like the fans are mocking him (why are they doing this?) He then says that if they were supporting him they wouldn’t be chanting yes for The Rock. He says that even if the fans are genuinely supporting him all the yes chants that doesn’t make it better that AJ cost him the World Title. Then he flips out on AJ saying that his match was 18 seconds. Then he mentions that he beat 2 giants at the Royal Rumble and retained the World Title at the Elimination Chamber against 5 guys. Then he says that at WrestleMania it was flushed down the toilet. He blames AJ for having to have that kiss. Then the fans chant 18 seconds (not sure if that chant was piped in later). Then he says that that kiss wasn’t his good luck charm but the kiss of death. AJ begs him to stop and Daniel says that she doesn’t get to rewrite the story and make him the bad guy, and he says that this is her fault. Then he says that he had everything going for him. He mentions that he walked into his first WrestleMania as World Champion (Last year would’ve been his first WrestleMania if the didn’t bump his match with Sheamus of the card!). He then says that he’s dreamed about that ever since he was a little kid and she ruined everything. He says that she had to steal the spotlight. He then says that her selfishness cost what should have been the greatest night of his life. Then he says that he hopes that she is happy with herself because he won’t let her ruin his life like that ever again. Then Daniel says that he has a rematch clause with Sheamus and when he gets that match he will do it the right way, by himself. He tells her to go and cry in the parking lot because he is finally ready to get rid of all of this dead weight. AJ then pleads with him to go backstage and talk but Daniel says no. He says that isn’t talking to her backstage or anywhere. He then says that he hopes that kiss at WrestleMania was worth it because that is the last kiss that she will ever get from him. Then he says that they’re through. Then he tells her to get out of his ring. She pleads with him and then he screams at he said to get out. He turns his back to her while she begins to cry. Then after a bit she leaves the ring and the fans give the hey hey good bye bit. She walks up the ramp to the back and holds her hands in front of her face as the fans chant yes. This was a really awesome heal prom from Daniel Bryan. The guy really knows how to play the role well and AJ was good at being the innocent sympathetic girl too.

Cody Rhodes is doing commentary for the next match.

Big Show out for his match but before it starts he looks to the Tron and the show still shots of him punching out Coat at WrestleMania.

Intercontinental Champion Big Show vs. Heath Slater. Show gets the pin. This was a squash. Afterwards Big Show invites Cody to come into the ring. Cody was about come in but Big Show made him back down. Then as Cody is headed up the ramp, Big Show punched out Heath Slater. Then Cody slides into the ring tries to sneak up on Big Show but Big Show caught him and chased Cody off.

They reshow the CM Punk-Chris Jericho segment from Monday.

They show Johnny Ace backstage with the Bella Twins Johnny tells Brie that she picked the right team and then the Twins bicker like usual. Then Sheamus comes in. Ace says that he wanted to see him. Then he tells Nikki to get ready for her match with Beth Phoenix and he gives Brie the night off. They walk out and then Ace tells Sheamus that this is a new day for Smackdown. New Champion, new GM, new era. “People Power.” Sheamus asks what that means. Ace says it means good sportsmanship. Then Johnny mentions that he saw what Sheamus did to Daniel Bryan at WrestleMania. Ace says that Daniel wasn’t ready and Sheamus kicked Daniel’s head off. Then he says that on Raw Alberto was trying to talk to Sheamus and Sheamus kicked Del Rio’s head off too. Johnny then says that he expects more professionalism out of a champion. Then Johnny says that when Sheamus faces Alberto tonight he has told the referee to bring them face to face before the match starts. Sheamus says that’s fair and that Johnny is right. Then he says that from now he promises that only people who will get their heads kicked off are the ones who truly deserve it. Whether it’s a cowardly weasel who hides behind his girlfriend or a rich guy who thinks he’s better than everyone, or somebody like his cousin who was the town bully because he was in charge of the local mill. Then Johnny says that he hates bullies. Sheamus then says good for him. Then he gets back to his cousin saying that all the power couldn’t save him and that the people finally turned against him. This was a mixed bag segment. Sheamus’ promo was good up till he mentioned his “cousin.” I have no idea why they have Sheamus tell these stories about people/relatives he knew and their “arses” as he says it.

Nikki Bella vs. Divas Champion Beth Phoenix. Nikki gets the pin when Kelly distracts Beth. This was your typical pointless Divas match.

They show a video tribute to Chief Jay Strongbow. Great and classy video!

Damien Sandow debuts with a backstage promo. He says that anyone who tries to make a distinction between education and entertainment doesn’t know the first thing about either. He says that entertainment is at an all time low and has no educational qualities. He then says Shakespeare & Mozart have been replaced by Desperate Housewives and fist pumping. He says that historically anyone can judge a civilization by how they choose to entertain themselves. He says that it is a direct reflection on their moral and ethical code. He then says that sadly people’s reflection shows that people today are lazy and complacent. He says that he pledges to never blame the people but to save them from their ignorance. Good debut promo.

They recap Brock Lesnar coming out and flattening Cena from Monday.

They show and ad for Monday that the guys playing the 3 stooges in the new crappy movie will be guest starring on Raw. God help us all! I’ve been a 3 Stooges fan for 20 years and they’re all time greats!! This movie from what I heard is a complete disgrace!!

World Champion Sheamus vs. Alberto Del Rio. Alberto wins by DQ. Ricardo got up on the apron and Sheamus kicked hi. While the referee was pre occupied with Ricardo, Alberto got a chair but Sheamus got it and the referee saw Sheamus with the chair and called for the bell. Then Ricardo announces Alberto’s name and they head up the ramp. Sheamus is about to go after them but the referee takes the chair out of Sheamus’ hand. Then Sheamus gets pissed off and Brogue Kicks the referee. Ricardo & Alberto head up the ramp taunting Sheamus as Sheamus stares them down from the ring. This ends the show.

I thought this was a weaker show. The opening segment with Teddy Long, Johnny Ace & David Otunga was idiotic. I liked the Sheamus-Del Rio match but wasn’t crazy about the DQ ending. I also liked Damien Sandow’s debut promo. I thought he did a good job. The handicap match was dumb and the Divas match was meaningless. I wasn’t totally into the Sheamus-Johnny Ace promo either. I thought Sheamus cut a good promo up till the cousin bit. Daniel Bryan cut a really good heal promo too! He really knows how to play the role of a heal. Overall I thought this was a weaker show than usual and I have a feeling this will be the pattern.

4-5-12 Impact results and thoughts

Coverage and thoughts on the April 5, 2012 episode of Impact

The show starts with Sting & Dixie Carter in the ring. Dixie says it’s a very big night for TNA. She says that she asked the entire roster to come out so that she can introduce a man who needs no introduction but she’ll give him one anyway. She welcomes Hulk Hogan. Hogan comes out, his pyro goes off and the fans chant his name. Hulk says it’s to nice to be back on Impact as the GM. Then he thanks Sting and Dixie for the second chance. He says that there will be new things happening with TNA. Then he says that he’s going to make some Lockdown decision and announces Matt Morgan vs. Crimson for the PPV and says their feud will end there. Then he gets to Gail Kim and says there will be a 6 Knockouts gauntlet match to find out who will challenge her for the title at Lockdown. Then he says that he and Eric Bischoff need to talk right now and he calls Eric out. Ric Flair tells Hulk Eric isn’t there but and Hogan tells Flair that Eric better show up. Then Bobby Roode’s music hits and he comes out and Hogan says that he showed up late. Roode says that he does whatever he wants. Then Roode says that there is nothing and no one that will stop him from being the greatest TNA champion in history. He says that at Lockdown he will successfully defend his Title against James Storm and says that until then “the champ’s outta here.” Then Hogan says that things have changed around here now that he’s in charge. Then he has Ken Anderson come in the ring and says that the fans want to see Roode face Anderson tonight. Roode flips and Hogan that match will happen tonight. Hulk then turns to Kurt Angle and tells him that he won’t face Jeff Hardy at Lockdown. Then Hulk says that the fans want to see Angle face Jeff tonight and that’s happening right now. This was a typical Hulk Hogan yaps for 10 minutes to start the show segment. I have no idea why Dixie and Sting want him running Impact when he took control of TNA last fall!

Jeff Hardy vs. Kurt Angle. Jeff wins by count out when Angle walks out. This was a good back and forth match. I wasn’t surprised the match had this kind of ending since I knew they would have a rematch at Lockdown.

Hulk Hogan is watching backstage and Kurt Angle comes in and Hulk says that Angle will face Jeff Hardy at Lockdown.

Ric Flair calls Eric Bischoff and Flair tells him that he has to get to the building. He says that Hogan’s back in power and Flair tells Eric to hurry to the building. Eric says he’s on his way.

Backstage promo from Bully Ray. The cameraman asks his prediction for the Storm-Roode match. He says that he will be the next World Champion and is tired of hearing their names. Then he says that he is going to deal with Austin Aries. Good promo like usual from Ray.

Bully Ray is in the ring and says that he is confused and he asks Austin Aries why a small guy like him would want to piss off a big guy like Ray. Ray says that he has eaten chicken wings that were bigger than him. Then Austin Aries comes to the ring and goes after Ray. He punches him in the corner but then Ray turns it into a power bomb. Then Ray gets the mic and asks Aries if he knows who he is. Then he walks out. This was a good segment. Ray cut a good promo and I liked Aries coming out and going after Ray.

They show Joseph Park from “earlier in the day” asking a catering guy if he’s seen Abyss. Then he gives the guy his card. This is getting old.

AJ Styles promo backstage talking about the Storm-Roode match. He says Roode is a dominant force but Storm might have the edge if he can get the last call on him. Then James Storm comes in and says that he would like AJ to be his opponent tonight. AJ agrees and says that it will be hard to hit the last call on him.

Mickie James vs. Winter vs. Tara vs. Angelina Love vs. Madison Rayne vs. Velvet Sky. Velvet wins when she pins Mickie. This was a good match but I’m not into the one pin stip in a multi person match.

Ken Anderson is backstage and he says that the same thing will happen to Roode at Lockdown that will happen to him tonight. Then Roode comes in with his security and he gives Anderson a chance to walk off. Then Anderson says why wait, Roode tells him he’s gonna get hurt and walks out. Then Roode’s security guys get in front of Anderson.

They show James Storm and Jeff Hardy at some music convention and they talk about how awesome it was.

Time for Eric Young’s bachelor party. There’s a few random guys there and he has some lollipops. Then ODB comes in has some guy bring in a bowl of chicken wings. The other guys walk out. Then Young tells ODB that she’s the only one for him. Then ODB says that every night will be a bachelor party for Eric once they’re married. This was goofy but not as bad as I was expecting.

James Storm vs. AJ Styles. Storm gets the pin. This was a good back and forth match. Afterwards Storm helps AJ up and they shake hands. Then AJ gets a beer bottle to Storm. Then Storm gets the mic and says that next week he wants Bobby Roode to look him in the eye one last time before he kicks his teeth down his throat.

Hulk Hogan & Sting are backstage and Hulk tells him to go home recover. Sting agrees but he says it’s not easy for him. Hogan says that Sting might get better faster than he thinks. Then he tells Sting that he will call him if things get crazy. This makes no sense at all.

They show these 2 country guys backstage and then James Storm comes in. Then Bobby Roode comes in and rags on the guys. He then mentions that he was also a friend of Storm’s till he hit him with a beer bottle. He says that he will do the same in 10 days. Then he spits water at them and they go after him.

Time for the long awaited return of The Motor City Machine Guns.

Motor City Machine Guns vs. Mexican America. Machine Guns win when Shelley pins Anarquia. This was a good match. It’s good to see Chris Sabin back. Afterwards Sabin gets the mic and says that they want the TNA Tag Team Titles. Magnus & Joe vs. The Machine Guns should be good!

Ric Flair is backstage and Eric Bischoff shows up. Flair is flipping out about Hogan making matches for Lockdown. Then Eric says that Hulk needs to know that Flair is a 2 time Hall of Famer. Then he says that he will put Hogan back in his box. I wasn’t into this. I’m really tired of this Hogan-Bischoff saga. I’m also tired of Ric Flair!!

Hulk Hogan is in the ring saying that everyone is ready for Lockdown. Then he tells Eric Bischoff to come to the ring. Eric comes out on the stage and says that it’s ironic that they’re on opposite sides. He says that he never would have imagined this. Then he says that it makes sense because they have a lot of differences (not that I know of) but the main difference is that Hulk doesn’t have a vision that others can base their lives and careers on. He calls Hulk an opportunist and says that he will tag on to anything that he will most likely benefit from while he on the other hand is a leader (whatever). Hulk says that Eric is a leader at blowing hot air. Then Hulk says that rather than Garrett vs. Gunner Eric should set up a team and Hulk will have Garrett form a team and they will face at Lockdown. Hulk says that if Eric’s team wins then Garrett will be off the TNA roster but if Garrett’s team wins then Eric is out of TNA and Eric will never use the Bischoff name again. Eric accepts. Then Hulk says that at Lockdown the battle of the Bischoffs ends at Lockdown. Who cares about any of this!? I really hope to God that this storyline does end at Lockdown!

They show a James Storm video package with Storm saying that there’s been a huge turn in a year. Than they have Roode’s wife and she said Storm and Roode were close friends. Storm says that Bobby is an animal but he knows deep down that Storm will knock his lights out. Storm talks more about how he’s gonna beat Roode at Lockdown. This was a decent video.

Bobby Roode comes out and he has his security guys with him but referee Brian Hebner kicks them out. Then Anderson goes after Roode.

Ken Anderson vs. TNA World Champion Bobby Roode. Roode gets the pin after hitting Anderson with a beer bottle. This was ok. Then James Storm comes out with Hulk Hogan. Storm hits the ring and Roode head up the ramp. Then Hulk says that he is reversing the decision of the match and that Anderson wins by DQ. Then Roode says that they can both kiss his world championship ass and that ends the show.

I thought this was a mixed bag episode overall. Hulk’s opening promo was a typical long Hulk Hogan starts the show kind of promo and the Anderson-Roode match was ok. I was ok with Storm & Hulk coming out afterwards. I was surprised that Hulk reversed the decision of the match since that makes sense and usually whatever makes sense doesn’t happen. The rest of the show was hit and miss. It was good to see Chris Sabin back. The match wasn’t much but it nice to see him back in the ring and their match with Magnus & Joe should be good. Hopefully that will happen at Lockdown. I couldn’t stand the Hogan-Eric Bischoff promo! I am so sick of both these 2 guys! Please let this end already! Get Flair off my TV too!! James Storm & AJ Styles had a good match and so did Jeff Hardy & Kurt Angle. The Eric Young-ODB stuff was typical Young comedy but not as bad as usual. Probably because it was short. The Knockouts match was but I’m not a fan of the first pin or submission wins. I like when multi person matches are done with elimination ruling. The Austin Aries-Bully Ray segment was good too. Ray cut a good promo and Aries just going after him made sense also. I’d love to see these 2 in a singles match. I think it could be fun! On the whole I thought this was a mixed bag edition of Impact.

4-2-12 Raw results and thoughts

Coverage and thoughts on the April 2, 2012 night after WrestleMania episode of Raw

The show starts with the whole roster backstage and Johnny Ace & David Otunga are standing before them. Ace talks about becoming GM of both shows last night. He then says that he will not abuse his power and says that he will give the fans what they want. He tells Santino Marella that he will defend the U.S. Title against Jack Swagger & Dolph Ziggler. The CM Punk comes in and says that he speaks for everyone when he says that Ace is still considered to be a giant tool box. Then Ace tells Punk that he will defend the WWE Title against Mark Henry. Then he welcomes everyone to the era of “People Power.” This was a decent start to the show. Punk cut a good promo as usual.

The Rock comes to the ring and does his usual posing and the fans chant his name. Then Rock says that 14 months ago, but he before he can say anything the fans chant, “You still got it” and Rock thanks them. He mentions how he returned to WWE 14 months ago and says how he electrified the fans everywhere. Then he says that last night was a history making record breaking crowd at WrestleMania. Then he says that he has finally come back home. He says that there is one man he has to thank and that is John Cena. The fans boo that and chant Cena sucks. Rocks says that last night Cena brought to him like never before. He mentions that when Cena was putting a beating on him he was thinking, “Somebody get this guy off me.” Then he says that at the end of the day it was an honor to be in the ring with Cena and that they made history for the fans. Rock then thanks his family and then the fans. He does the, “millions of fans” bit. Then he says that in 1999 he was cut from the Canadian Football League. He thanks the Miami fans that he stands before them as the People’s Champion. He says that this not the end but it is just the beginning. The fans go nuts and chant, “Thank you Rocky.” Rocks says that after last night he’s had this vision. He says that he was celebrating and then he had a vision and he told people about it and they said it was impossible but The Rock wipes a monkey’s ass with that word. Then he asks the fans if they want to hear his vision. He says that the vision is that one day he will walk down that aisle once again as WWE Champion. The fans do the Daniel Bryan yes chant. Rock thanks the fans and says that vision will come true. Then he does the if ya smell bit. Great Rock promo! This guy is the greatest talker ever!

They show a clip of a John Cena promo from last month. Then they say that Cena we will hear from Cena later tonight.

U.S. Champion Santino Marella vs. Jack Swagger vs. Dolph Ziggler for the Title. Santino wins when he pins Swagger. This was a solid match. Afterwards they attack Santino but Santino bails. They chase him up the ramp and then Brodus Clay comes out. Clay lays out Dolph. Then He & Santino stare down Swagger and the funkettes come out and time for Brodus & Santino to call their mommas. This was typical Funkasauras idiocy.

Time for the debut of Lord Tensai. A Japanese guy comes out and throws salt and then “Albert” Tensai comes out. He comes out with a robe and mask. His victim will be Alex Riley. Tensai takes the mask off and the crowd reacted a bit. Cole and Lawler act like they never saw him before, which I found to be dumb.

Alex Riley vs. Lord Tensai. Tensai wins when the referee stops the match. This was a squash. Tensai pounded Riley the whole match.  Afterwards Tensai locks Riley in a claw on his head.

They show CM Punk backstage and he will defend his Title against Mark Henry next.

They show the empty arena John Cena promo when said that no one remembers second place.

WWE Champion CM Punk vs. Mark Henry. Henry wins by count out. This was a good match.

Afterwards Henry gives Punk the World’s Strongest Slam on the floor. Then Johnny Ace comes out and says that Punk will defend the Title more often.

Then Chris Jericho comes out through the crowd and says that they had a classic match last night and that they should celebrate with a drink. Then he talks about Punk being straight edge and says that he will be the reason Punk starts drinking just like his dad. Then Jericho pours “booze” on punk and attacks him. Then Jericho gets another bottle and says that it’s Punk’s blood to be a drinker. Then he says he shouldn’t drink too much because it will go straight to his head. Then he breaks the bottle over Punk’s head. This was good stuff. Jericho’s promos are really awesome. It looks like the Punk-Jericho feud will continue but I’d also like to see Punk in a feud with Mark Henry.

The new World Champion Sheamus comes to the ring and holds up the belt. He was about to speak but then Alberto Del Rio makes his return. Alberto mentions Sheamus winning the title in 18 seconds but no one will remember in a month. He says that Sheamus has a new challenger and Ricardo announces Del Rio’s name again. Then Sheamus says it’s great to see him. Then he says that the fans want to see Sheamus brogue kick someone in the face. He says that he will get to show the fans something they will never forget. Then Del Rio says that Johnny Ace has made Sheamus vs. Del Rio for Smackdown. He then says that when he wins he will get a World Title match. Del Rio kept speaking but the mic went out. As he was going to get a second one, Sheamus gives him a Brogue Kick. This was good segment. Del Rio cut a good promo and the match on Smackdown should be good. They show Daniel Bryan & AJ watching backstage on a monitor and then Josh Mathews comes in and mentions Daniel losing the title in 18 seconds. Daniel has no comment.    

Kofi Kingston vs. Cody Rhodes. Kofi gets the pin. Big Show comes out and says that he has something he wants to show Cody. Then they show the still shots of Big Show punching Cody out last night. This allowed Kofi hit Cody with the Trouble in Paradise for the pin. This was decent. It was more of continuing the Big Show-Cody Rhodes storyline than a match.

They show Cena’s promo from last Monday when he told Rock he needed to win at WrestleMania.

Mark Henry is backstage and throws down a luggage back. Then Abraham Washington comes in and says that he would like to represent Henry. He gives Henry his card and tells him to think about it.

Eve Torres comes out on the stage and says that everyone wants to have their WrestleMania moment and last night she got hers. She says that she easily manipulated Zack Ryder. Then she says that she could do that to any guy except Johnny Ace because powerful guys can’t be manipulated. She says that if her actions helped Ace then so be it. Whatever. This was terrible!

Zack Ryder vs. The Miz. Miz gets the pin. This was short and meaningless match. Poor Zack. They really yanked away any chance he had of getting over.

They announce that Randy Orton will face Kane on Smackdown and that Sheamus will face Alberto Del Rio.

John Cena comes to the ring and the fans boo. He says that he never thought of losing but that it’s happened the only thing to do is to do it right. He says that we all take defeats in life. He then says that he’s talked a lot and says that he meant everything that he said. He says throughout the whole year he didn’t think he was going to lose because if he had he would have already lost. He talks about how people sometimes lose. Then he mentions that there was talk of how he would react to losing. The fans chant you’re a loser. Cena asks if this is the day he finally lashes out at the fans. They chant yes, but he says that won’t happen. He says that as a man he will admit defeat. He says that this will not be the final moment of his career. Then he thanks the fans who supported him. Then he points out the MGK guy and the fans boo. He then apologizes for letting the fans down and says that he will try to be the best he can be. Then he says that he & Rock have been calling each other for a year and they settled it last night. Then the fans chant we want Lesnar. Cena says that he would like to invite The Rock to come back to the ring. He says that Dwayne is a guy who earned his respect and wants everyone to know that he considers Rock a champion. He says there should be 1 more moment of celebration for Rock. Then he talks about how crazy the past year has been. The fans chant we want Lesnar again. Cena says that he put his heart and soul into last night and that The Rock was the better man. Cena acknowledges the yes chants from the crowd and he says that Daniel Bryan owes him one. Then he says that he respects Rock and the fans chant Daniel Bryan. Cena says again that he wants to congratulate Rock on his win. Then Brock Lesnar’s music plays and he comes to a massive pop. He walks around the ring looking at Cena. Then he gets in the ring and poses and the fans cheer and chant his name. Then Lesnar gives Cena the F5. Lesnar stands over Cena for a bit and then poses on the turnbuckle to end the show. Cena’s promo was decent, but I thought he talked too much about losing in life. Lesnar coming out and giving Cena the F5 was a cool moment.

I thought this was a good show overall this week. The Rock cut his usual great promo at the start of the show and the Cena promo was ok. Lesnar coming out got a huge pop from the fans. It was kinda cool to see him back actually. CM Punk & Mark Henry had a good match too and Chris Jericho’s promo was really good too. He really knows how to play the role of the slimy heal. I also liked the Sheamus-Del Rio face off. Nice to see Alberto back and hopefully he and Sheamus will have a good feud. Ryder-Miz was not much. They’ve completely made both guys look like jabrones. Eve’s promo was awful also. They start of the show with Johnny Ace talking to the roster was kinda dull but Punk’s part of the segment was good. The Santino-Swagger-Dolph was decent but predictable. I knew that Jack & Dolph would turn on each other and that would allow Santino to win and that’s just what happened. It looks like they’ll be having Santino team up with Brodus Clay. Who cares? The Kofi Kingston-Cody Rhodes match wasn’t much either. This was more about Big Show giving Cody the same treatment Cody had been giving him for weeks. On the whole I thought this was a decent show and a good follow up to WrestleMania.

3-29-12 Impact results and thoughts

Coverage and thoughts on the March 29, 2012 episode of Impact

The show starts with Dixie Carter backstage saying that we will find out Hulk Hogan’s response about running the show tonight.

 

Bobby Roode comes to the ring with a lot of security guys. He cuts a promo on Dixie Carter, Sting & James Storm. Then Storm comes out and he promises that he will beat Roode for the World Title. He goes after Roode but security prevents him from attacking. Then Bully Ray comes out and attacks Storm from behind. Then Roode bails. Storm demands Roode get back in the ring. Then Storm tells both of them that he is willing to face Ray & Roode in a handicap match. They accept. This was a good opening segment. Roode cut a good promo as usual. Him saying that he beat Sting physically and mentally and saying that he is the reason why Sting stepped down as the guy in charge was really good.

They show Madison Rayne & Gail Kim backstage and Gail says that the past month has been hard on their friendship and she got Madison a gift. Madison opens the box and inside is a Tierra. Madison puts it on and Gail says that Madison will kick the crap out of Velvet tonight. Then they hug.

Velvet Sky vs. Madison Rayne. Velvet gets the pin. This was a solid match. Afterwards Christie asks Velvet what’s next. Velvet says that Gail never gave her a Title rematch. She says that she is coming for Gail and her Title.

Bobby Roode & Bully Ray are backstage and Ray says that they should be worried about James Storm since he took out Daniels & Kazarian last week. Ray then mentions that Roode doesn’t think he has anything to worry about. Then he says they should take care of the thorn in their side.

They show the “earlier in the day” segment where Dixie asks Hulk to run the place. She says she never trusted Eric. Hulk says that there were some good and bad moments. They go back and forth a lot and they talk about Sting stepping down and Hulk saying he isn’t sure if he wants to take charge. There’s a lot more yapping and Hulk says he will think about it. This was WAY too long and completely idiotic. There was a lot of back and forth that was really meaningless!

They show a video package recapping the Matt Morgan-Crimson storyline.

Backstage Kurt Angle says that he will give Jeff Hardy a rematch at Lockdown if Jeff beats Ken Anderson tonight.

Morgan-Crimson was next but Austin Aries comes out. He says that he has a problem and his name is Bully Ray. He mentions that James Storm beat him fast at

Victory Road

. Aries then mentions that Ray took his frustrations out on him and the other X-Division guys. Aries says that he says what’s on his mind and says that sounds like James Storm. Aries says that respects Storm and he mentions that he knows Storm wants Roode and he wants Ray. Then he says that he will team with Storm against Ray & Roode later. This was a good Austin Aries promo.

Matt Morgan vs. Crimson. The match goes to a double count out when they go at it at ringside. Afterwards they brawl through the arena and out the door. This was a decent match/brawl.

Joseph Park comes into the production truck and asks if they’ve seen Abyss. They haven’t of course and then he gives out his business card. I have no idea what their doing here.

Ken Anderson vs. Jeff Hardy. Anderson gets the pin when Kurt Angle comes in. This match was ok.

They play the new James Storm music video.  This was long and pointless.

They show Dixie Carter getting out of a limo. Then they show Eric Bischoff backstage and he is on his way to the ring.

They show Eric Young & ODB at some store talking about their wedding. Then some chick comes by and they look over a lot of stuff. ODB tells the chick to beat it. Then ODB tells Eric that they will get married in a steel cage. Eric is all ecstatic. Whatever. Goofball Eric Young doesn’t work for me.

Eric Bischoff comes to the ring and talks about how amazing he is. He talks about how he can get camera time whenever he wants (so we’ve noticed). Then he says that he wanted Dixie gone as GM. Then he says that there’s something he can’t off his to do list but he will take care of that right now. Then he calls out his son. Garrett comes out and Eric gives him one last chance to walk away from wrestling. Eric tells Garrett that he wants him to face Gunner at Lockdown but he can avoid all that by walking away. Garrett calls Eric a thick headed jackass and says that he isn’t going anywhere and that putting him in a cage with Gunner doesn’t scare him. Then Garrett says that he will be at Lockdown and will face Gunner. I wasn’t into this. This whole battle of the Bischoffs is really idiotic!

They show James Storm doing some training and talking about Beer Money. He mentions how they were a good team and then Bobby broke it up. He says that at Lockdown he will earn the right to be World Champion. This was decent video package.

They show Hulk Hogan backstage.

James Storm & X-Division Champion Austin Aries vs. Bully Ray & TNA World Champion Bobby Roode. Storm & Aries win when Storm pins Ray after Roode spits beer in Ray’s face by mistake and then Storm gives him a super kick for the 3 count. This was a good match and the best one of the show.

Hulk Hogan is backstage making his way to the ring.

Dixie Carter is in the ring and asks Hulk Hogan to come out. He comes out and the fans chant his name. Dixie says that taking over as GM is a big decision. Then she says that she wants Hogan to run Impact. Hogan thanks Dixie, Sting & the fans. Then he mentions their talk from before. Then he says that he has closed the book on this part of his life. Then Sting and the rest of the TNA roster come out and Sting says that Hogan won’t deny him, Dixie, or the fans and that the writing is on the wall. Then he asks Hulk what he’s gonna do. Hulk asks if they’re talking about a clean slate. Sting nods and Hogan says that no matter how deep the water gets he needs to know if Sting will watch his back. Sting says he will and then he asks Hogan if he will take the job and run Impact like the eye of the tiger Hulk Hogan. Then Hogan says that Impact has a new GM. Hulk then says his watcha gonna do line and they all celebrate in the ring to end the show. This makes no sense! Why would the company want Hogan in charge when he was a heal and took over the company a year and a half ago!?

This was a middle of the road show. I liked Roode’s opening promo but the Sting-Dixie-Hogan was idiotic. The bit with Dixie & Hogan was way too long and the closing segment wasn’t too good either. Storm & Aries vs. Ray & Roode was the best match and I think the highlight of the show. The Bischoff storyline continues to bore me and the Eric Young-ODB segment was typical Eric Young goofiness. Matt Morgan & Crimson was decent too. I thought they did a solid job in continuing their feud. I am also looking forward to the Motor City Machine Guns returning next week but overall I thought this week’s show was a mixed bag. It wasn’t terrible but it wasn’t great either.