12-2-13 Raw results and thoughts

Coverage and thoughts on the December 2, 2013 Raw

The show starts with CM Punk coming to the ring. He says that for a week he’s been trying to figure out why The Shield attacked him. Now a week later he knows why. It was because he criticized HHH last week. Now he finds himself in denial & hoping it’s a coincidence. If it isn’t he doesn’t wanna have anything to do with “the authority”.  HHH can’t be that dense as to pick a fight with a guy who prides himself on being anti-authority. If he’s right then HHH & company are the sorriest bunch of ignorant douchebags he’s had to deal with. Then out comes Stephanie. She hopes Punk & everyone had a great Thanksgiving. Punk says she doesn’t care about that. She says there couldn’t be bigger advocates of free speech than her family. Sending The Shield after Punk is beneath them. She & HHH were just as upset as Punk when The Shield attacked him last week. Then she mentions the contract signing for the WWE-World Title match. If Punk has anything more to say he can ask Kane. Then Kane comes out. He says it’s his job to handle day to day issues & to make sure WWE runs smoothly. The authority had nothing to do with The Shield’s attack, this issue is resolved. Does Punk have any questions? Punk asks when Kane became the big red ass kisser. Kane says they’re not his enemy. Punk says since Kane sold out by hanging up his mask for a cheap suit, Kane can get knocked out or Punk can make him go to sleep. Cue The Shield’s music & out they come through the crowed. Punk gets a chair as they head to the ring. Stephanie tells The Shield to stop. She won’t have a repeat of last week. Punk is to be respected & admired. Kane then says that Punk also deserves to be challenged. Then he says that at TLC Punk will face all 3 Shield guys in a handicap match. This was a mixed bag opening segment. Punk was good on the mic like usual, Stephanie was ok & Kane talking like he was reading off a cue card was weak. I also knew that once Kane added challenged to respected & admired that they were gonna have Punk face The Shield.

They mention that the fans can vote on what the unified title will be called. The Undisputed WWE Title, The Undisputed World Title or the Unified Title. That makes no sense.

Damien Sandow is in the ring. He says he will beat Dolph tonight & then beat Big E for the IC Title. You’re welcome. Then out comes Dolph. Big E is also on commentary. They didn’t even have Sandow’s entire promo on the show.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Damien Sandow to see who will challenge for the IC Title. Sandow gets the pin. This was a decent match & thank God they didn’t have another meaningless brawl.

Natalya & The Bella Twins vs. Divas Champion AJ Lee, Tamina Snuka & Summer Rae. Natalya & The Bellas win when Natalya pins AJ. This was ok. Then AJ skips up the ramp.

Next week is the Raw Slammy Awards. I’m dreading that!

Justin Roberts introduces “Bad news Barrett”. Wade’s in a suit, & standing in front a podium that’s next to the announce table. Barrett has good news & bad news. The good news is that they’re live on Raw. The bad news is they’re stuck in an arena full of hillbillies who had to name their city after their state so they can remember it. This is how they have Wade Barrett return to TV? Who came up with Bad News Barrett? Terrible.

Backstage we see Orton & Brad. Orton’s glad Brad’s back. He apologizes for not being sympathetic about Brad’s injuries. Then he says that he needs Brad to tell HHH & Stephanie that they need to recognize him as the greatest WWE Champion ever. He is the face of WWE & his name is more well-known & respected than Cena’s or anybody’s. He also tells Brad to tell HHH & Stephanie that he’s bigger than the WWE itself. This was weak.

Daniel Bryan comes to the ring for his match with Erik Rowan. Daniel was kidnapped last week & comes to the ring tonight doing the yes chant like nothing ever happened. Break time.

Back from break & out go the lights. They come back on and Harper & Rowan are in the ring.

Then they reshow The Wyatts Daniel from last week. Then they show Bray’s promo from Smackdown.

Daniel Bryan vs. Erik Rowan. Daniel gets the pin. This was a good match.

Then out go the lights again & Bray is on the stage. He tells Harper & Rowan to stand down. He tells Daniel they won’t hurt him unless he tells them to. Since Bray’s been on this Earth he’s done a lot of horrible things to a lot of good people. He is man enough to admit when he was wrong. He was wrong about Daniel. He saw Daniel as this miniscule little creature climbing up a hill. He saw Daniel chasing his girlfriend around. How long till “they” discover that Daniel’s dirty feet soil that red carpet? Bray sees Daniel for what he really is but “they” see him as a circus clown. “They” can’t love him like Bray can. Together Daniel & Bray can break down the walls of this place. This was the usual cryptic promo that we get from Bray.

Backstage we see Daniel & he bumps into Kane. Kane congratulates Daniel on his win. Then Kane says that since Daniel & Punk are friends Daniel should also be in a handicap match. At TLC Daniel will face The Wyatts.  This was ok but I don’t know why they’re having two 3 on 1 matches on a PPV.

R-Truth & Xavier Woods vs. Tons of Funk. Truth & Woods win when Woods pins Brodus. This was a decent match too.

Sin Cara makes his return. Then out comes Del Rio. He says Cara represents all the other peasants while trying to cross the border. Tonight he will beat down Cara & send Cara back to the other side of the border. I’m not sure why Del Rio cut a Zeb Coulter like promo.

Sin Cara vs. Alberto Del Rio. Cara gets the pin. This was a solid match & I was surprised that Cara won. I do wish they’d get rid of the yellow & blue lighting during Cara’s matches though.

They show Orton punting Cena’s dad in the head from August 2007. Man they’re really hyping this up. I wouldn’t be at all surprised if they do a screwy finish at TLC.

Backstage Renee Young interviews Cena. He has a historic match coming up at TLC. If he becomes undisputed champion, what does that mean to him? Cena says there has been a debate for 5 decades over which title has more meaning. If you lived in the south the World (NWA/WCW) Title was the main belt. If you lived in the North the WWE Title was. He’s been WWE Champion & is proud to be World Champion, but WWE deserves to have 1 champion. Being the undisputed champion means everything to him. This was a decent Cena promo. I liked that he put over how much both titles mean & have meant in the past.

Cut to The Shield. Ambrose says Punk can’t beat them at TLC. Rollins says Punk wouldn’t last 5 minutes. Reigns tells Punk to stay away from them. Then Ambrose says to Believe in The Shield.

WWE Tag Team Champion Cody Rhodes & Goldust and Big Show vs. The Shield. The Shield wins when Rollins pins Goldust. This was a really good back & forth match. The finish came when Goldust superplexed Ambrose from the top rope & then Rollins rolled up Goldust for the pin.

They show highlights of the Cena-Orton match from Breaking point back in September 2009.

Backstage Renee Young wants Punk’s thoughts about facing The Shield at TLC. Punk wants to thank the “creative genius” who came up with this “never before seen” match. He starts to sing. Then he says he knows he’s going down, but the question is how many Shield guys will he take with him. This was a good promo. Punk was great like usual.

Back to Bad News Barrett. He’s got bad news. This past Thursday was Thanksgiving. Everyone ate Turkey, stuffing, gravy & pumpkin pie. As a result the fans all have clogged arteries, they sweat when they eat & they’re all constipated. This was meaningless.

Backstage we see that Kofi & Miz have buried the hatchet for now. They’ll face Ryback & Curtis Axel tonight. That doesn’t really make any sense.

Kofi Kingston & The Miz vs. Ryback & Curtis Axel. Ryback & Axel win when Ryback pins Kofi. This was alright.

Then Miz helps Kofi up & then slaps him. Miz then walks up the ramp. So Miz is going to be a heel it looks like.

Los Matadores & El Torito plug WWE merchandise.

Mark Henry vs. Fandango. Henry gets the pin. This was a decent & short match. It did go longer than I expected though. I thought this was gonna be a squash.

They have a video package on the Titus-Cesaro match from Smackdown, followed by Titus barfing in JBL’s hat. Why did they reshow this?

The Primetime Players are in the ring. Then out come The Real Americans. Zeb asks what kind of man likes to puke another man? That guy is standing in the ring. Titus gives new meaning to PTP. Now it means primetime pukers. That wouldn’t be tolerated in Zeb’s America or whatever. We the people.

The Primetime Players vs. The Real Americans. The Real Americans win when Cesaro pins Darren. This was decent. Titus hinted at hurling again after Cesaro gave him the big swing.

Lawler gets the mic & it’s time to find out what the fans want the unified title to be called. They picked Unified Champion.

Time for the title unification contract signing as HHH & Stephanie come to the ring. They have tables, ladders & chairs in the ring & on the stage. HHH says in 2 weeks at TLC the WWE & World Titles will be hanging above the ring. Cena & Orton will compete in a Tables Ladders & Chairs match & the winner will walk out as THE champion. Stephanie says there will be 1 winner, 1 undisputed champion. Then Stephanie brings out Orton. Then she brings out Cena. HHH thanks them for coming out. Stephanie then says that they got his message that he’s bigger than WWE. Then HHH says that Orton holds a title with a great history that’s been held by all the greats. Then he says that Cena is the World Title. That’s a title with a longer linage. HHH mentions all the guys who’ve held both titles & Stephanie mentions that HHH held them both. HHH says this isn’t a spur of the moment decision. They’ve thought about it for a while. Before they could commit they needed to know if they can be the face of WWE. Both guys have earned their place there & now they have a chance to cement their legacy forever. They’ve both looked over the contract, now it’s time to make it “official.” Orton signs first & then Cena does. Then Stephanie says they both have a chance to speak about this once in a life time match. The floor is Orton’s. Orton says that some of the biggest names in the industry have held these titles. Orton says that he’s better then all of them including HHH. But that is why HHH chose him to be the face of WWE. Orton’s the only 1 capable of beating Cena & he will in 2 weeks & walk out with both titles. Cena says that he & Orton have had tons of matches. Orton says he knows who Cena is. They have history. He kicked Cena’s dad in the head. Since then he’s made a career of destroying dreams & that’s what he will do to Cena. Despite Cena accomplishments the only reason he’s on this Earth…Cena cuts him off. Then Cena says 10 years ago HHH taught Orton how to be a success in WWE but Orton never lived up to his potential. HHH saw what we all saw. Orton makes everything in this ring look easy, but he has a bad attitude & he got lazy. HHH gave Orton Hall of Famers to learn from & pretty much Orton didn’t take advantage, etc. Orton thinks he should be given chances because of his dad. Cena earned the World Title. They have a historic match at TLC & anything Orton takes from Cena he will earn. Cena then says Orton can leave or he can make a move. Then Cena says that if Orton makes 1 single move to him right now the fans will be reminded of what a TLC match really is. Cena will bend a chair over his back; he will hit him with a ladder & put him through a table. Will Orton step up or will he step aside? Orton flips over the table & the predictable brawl starts. Cena hits Orton a ladder. They go at it on the floor & Orton sends Cena into the post. Then Orton takes apart the announce table but Cena hits him with a ladder. Then he hits Orton with a chair. Then he hits Orton with the mic. Then he rams Orton face first into the steel steps. Then he rolls Orton back in the ring but Orton topples a ladder down on Cena. Then Orton hits Cena with a chair. Then Orton throws the desk chair out of the ring. Then he sets up a table in the ring but Cena fights back & sends Orton through a table in the corner. Then he gives Orton the AA through the other table. Then Cena holds up both titles over his head & does the you can’t see me gesture to the unconscious Orton to end the show. This actually was a pretty decent segment. HHH & Stephanie didn’t really go too overboard here except for when Stephanie said that HHH held both titles. Orton & Cena both cut good solid promos & the brawl was good.    

I thought this week’s show was better than the last 2 weeks were but some of it seemed to drag. The opening segment with Punk, Kane & Stephanie was a mixed bag. Punk was good & Stephanie wasn’t as over the top usual. Kane’s promo was weak though. The contract signing/Cena-Orton brawl was pretty decent. They did a good job in building this up as a big time match but I still have this feeling that the match will end in a no finish. It certainly won’t be the greatest match in history. I have no idea why they had the fans vote on what they want the unified title to be called. The Primetime Players-Real Americans match was decent but I could’ve done without the hinting of Titus hurling again. The Kofi & Miz vs. Ryback & Axel match was alright. Nothing memorable. It looks like Miz is a heel since he slapped Kofi afterwards.  I liked the 6 man tag. That was the highlight of this week’s show. Mark Henry-Fandango was decent & wasn’t the squash I was expecting it to be. The 6 Divas tag was ok, the Bad News Barrett segments were meaningless, the Bryan-Rowan was good & Bray’s promo was the usual cryptic kind of promo that we get from him. I have no idea why they’re having two 3 on 1 matches at the PPV though. That doesn’t really sound appealing. Dolph-Sandow was decent & thankfully this match wasn’t a gimmick brawl. Big E vs. Sandow for the IC Title should be interesting. I don’t get why they’re having the slammy awards on the go home episode before the PPV. Punk’s backstage promo was good too. Punk is a great promo guy. Truth & Woods vs. Tons of Funk was decent & it looks like Brodus will be turning heel. The Sin Cara-Del Rio match was solid & I was surprised that Cara won. They do need to get rid of that lighting that the use for his matches though. Cena’s backstage promo putting over the titles was good too. For the most part I thought this week’s show was a mixed bag but it was better than the last 2 weeks. Overall I thought it was average.