12-13-13 Smackdown results and thoughts

Coverage and thoughts on the December 13, 2013 Smackdown

The show starts & they have the 2 world titles hanging above the ring.

Daniel Bryan vs. Erik Rowan. Daniel wins by DQ when Bray trips Daniel.

Afterwards Daniel is in the corner, Harper Irish whips Rowan into where Daniel is but Daniel gets out of the way. Then he ducks a clothesline from Harper, slides out of the ring & gives Bray the flying knee. This was good. The match was decent & I liked that they had Daniel get the better of The Wyatts here.

The Real Americans come to the ring. Zeb says that earlier today he walked around this godforsaken town & out of nowhere this big fat bearded freak appears in front of him dressed in a Santa Claus costume with his hand held out & he looked Zeb dead in his eyes & said Merry Christmas in Spanish. Zeb thought to himself that there’s someone speaking in a foreign language begging for money from a hard working American. To Zeb that sounds like an illegal immigrant. Zeb tells “Senor Claus” that if he could deport him he would. But since he can’t, he doesn’t like people sneaking across the border especially from the North Pole. We the People. This was your typical Zeb anti-foreigner promo.

WWE Tag Team Champions Goldust & Cody Rhodes vs. The Real Americans. The Real Americans win when Cesaro pins Cody. This was a good match.

They show a video package highlighting the careers of John Cena & Randy Orton & hyping up the title unification match.

Time for Bad News Barrett (This gimmick is stupid). He says that on Monday the fans surpassed themselves by voting in record numbers on the WWE App (They have to plug the App too) for the winners of the 2013 Slammy awards. In doing so the fans breathed fresh hope into a group of otherwise hopeless superstars (Says the guy with the hopeless gimmick). He does have some bad news though (The bad news is that Barrett is saddled with this lame gimmick). That being while the fans voted for a group of winners is was all the fans who were the true losers. He says that the fans’ opinions are worthless & they’re forced to live vicariously for a true winner like Bad News Barrett (He’s booked as anything but a winner).

Big E Langston is on commentary.

Mark Henry vs. Damien Sandow. Henry wins by count out when Sandow decides he’s had it.

Then Big E throws Sandow back in the ring & Henry clotheslines him. Then Big E gets on the apron, but Henry shoves Sandow into Big E, knocking him off the apron. Then Sandow bails a Big E gets in the ring. He stars at Sandow & holds up the belt. Then Big E heads up the ramp & chases Sandow to the back. The match was too short to be much of anything. This was about building to the IC Title match.

Natalya is on commentary.

The Bellas vs. Tamina Snuka & Divas Champion AJ Lee. Tamina & AJ win when AJ makes Brie tap. This was decent but short. Then Natalya & AJ look at each other. Natalya points to the belt & AJ holds it up.

John Cena comes to the ring. He says that things are heating up. He talks about the energy the fans had on Monday & says the fans tonight have a bit of that energy too. History was made on Monday when the WWE Champion & the World Champions willingly gave up their titles. Cena points to the 2 belts hanging above the ring & says that they’re 2 titles that guys have worked their entire lives for. 99% of all WWE superstars will never hold on to one of those titles (That seemed like he was kinda burying most of the roster). Why’d they give the belts away? Why is the World Title not in Cena’s hands? Why do both titles hang above his head? Because of the moment this Sunday. The history & impact that this means. This Sunday is monumental. It’s unbelievable. It is so obvious that even a cry baby, conceded simpleton like Orton knows this needs to happen. The sad thing is that Orton doesn’t know what it will take to make that happen. Cena’s known Orton for a long time, 12 years. Along those 12 years he’s had runs where he has called Orton a friend. That means that Cena knows exactly what Orton is capable of. Orton’s brutal, physical, conniving, calculating, he inflicts pain. Orton is what he says he is. He is the Apex predator (whatever that is). But in 12 years you learn a man’s strengths & his weaknesses. Cena says that Orton has a glass jaw. Orton doesn’t like to be hit too much. Anytime things don’t go Orton’s way he runs & hides. This Sunday there’s nowhere for Orton to run or hide. What will happen to Orton when he falls off of a ladder & his eye swells shut? What will happen to Orton when a steel chair is wrapped over his back & tingles down his spine, forcing his hands to go numb? What will happen to Orton when he crashes through a table & his body feels like it doesn’t move? Cena knows what will happen to himself. He will crash through a table & get back up. Cena was built to fight the Apex predator. Cena was built to take the beating of a lifetime because he never gives up & this Sunday Cena will get back up! Orton is great but this Sunday that is where he will fail. Because there will come a point this Sunday where he is hurt & broken. Orton’s body will feel like it can’t move & he will have to make a choice. Does Orton keep going or does he do what he’s done for 12 years? Make an excuse & take the easy way out. This Sunday Orton will make that choice & he will show the world what Cena already knows. Orton just hasn’t got the nuts. This Sunday WWE crowns 1 champion (Or will they). That champ is here. This was a really good & intense promo. Cena can cut good promos when he wants to.

Dean Ambrose is on commentary.

The Usos vs. Roman Reigns & Seth Rollins. Reigns & Rollins win when Reigns pins Jay. This match was really good.

Then Punk shows up on the Tron. He is broadcasting from an undisclosed location. Actually he’s in the arena basement. He says the basement is filthy but he knows it’s The Shield’s clubhouse. It’s where like to send their messages. Punk likes to send messages too. Like the message he sent on Monday when a certain somebody decided to put his hands on him. Then Punk talks about this Sunday. He believes it’s 3 on 1. The Shield against Punk. Punk believes that he is walking into a wholesale slaughter. Punk may be going down but the question that they need to be asking themselves is how many of them he’s taking with him. Punk believes that the last 2 times he’s been in the ring with a member of The Shield he has exposed their weaknesses. Believe in the best in the world. This was a good Punk promo.

Michael Cole announces that there will be a 4 way tag team match at TLC for the tag titles. The Rhodes Brothers vs. Rey Mysterio & Big Show vs. The Real Americans vs. Curtis Axel & Ryback.

Big Show (With Rey Mysterio) vs. Ryback (With Curtis Axel). Big Show gets the pin. This wasn’t much & thankfully it was short.

Then Axel hits Big Show from behind. Big Show grabs Axel’s throat & he sends him into Mysterio. Mysterio trips Axel into the ropes & then gives him the 619. Then Big Show gives Axel the KO punch. Who’d Ryback & Axel tick off?

Out go the lights & The Wyatts show up on the Tron. He’s been wondering about Daniel. Bray wanted to prove him wrong. Bray saw something in him. How could Bray have been such a fool? Bray put his neck on the line for Daniel. Then he screams deceiver & lies. Then he makes like he’s crying but it sounds that maniacal laugh he does. Then he says that there’s a place in the meadow, a place you can hide, walk with the reaper, leave this world behind. That’s Bray’s special lullaby song to Daniel. Bray sings that to all his pets before he puts them down. He will see Daniel Sunday. This was the usual creepy promo we get from Bray.

They show a Damien Sandow video package for some reason.

Next up was supposed to be Kofi vs. Del Rio but Miz comes out & gives Kofi the skull crushing finale on the floor. This was ok for what it was. I’m still not sure what the point of this Kofi-Miz feud is.

Time for more of the Michael Cole-HJHH interview. Cole says that Orton has asked for time on Smackdown to publicly apologize to HHH & Stephanie for his “actions.” Will HHH let him? HHH says absolutely. Will they accept Orton’s apology? HHH says that depends on how the apology is put out there. It’s all on how it’s said. HHH will look Orton in the eye to find out how sincere he is. That will determine I accepts Orton’s apology. Thankfully this was short. I’m way beyond tired of these interviews.

Randy Orton comes to the ring. He says that on Monday an unspeakable accident took place. It was supposed to be a historical night. The championship ascension ceremony was taking place but in broke down into a melee (Like all of those segments do) that caused Stephanie to be trampled forcibly down on the mat. Orton can’t get that image out of his head (This is coming from the guy who put his hands on the same woman almost 5 years ago). She was lying there unconscious & he’s glad she’s ok. Orton is out here right now because he wants to apologize to HHH & Stephanie but he wants to do it face to face (This way HHH can make his obligatory TV appearance). King of Kings plays & HHH comes out. Orton says that he & HHH have been to hell & back. They’ve fought many wars as friends & enemies. HHH knows Orton better than anybody (I thought Cena did). HHH has gotta know that what happened Monday was an accident. Orton says if there’s any doubt in HHH’s mind then he can take a look at the footage. They reshow what happened Monday. Then Orton says that if HHH still doubts him…Then the fans chant yes. Then Orton says that if HHH still doubts him he has more footage. He has a slow motion clip from a different angle that will prove his innocence. They show the slow motion clip. Now that HHH has seen the tape HHH knows that a lot of things happened that night. Things went wrong. Many people have many things to apologize about but Orton doesn’t care about that. All Orton cares about is this. He’d like HHH & Stephanie to accept his humble apology. HHH says that if Orton called him out there to show him footage, well he didn’t need to see that. He’s watched in over & over. Those are his cameras in case Orton’s forgotten (This is terrible). Then HHH says that a lot did go wrong Monday & a lot of people have a lot of things to apologize for & HHH isn’t 1 of them because he is the authority. That means he apologizes for nothing (Spoken like a true McMahon). They both know HHH can fire Orton for this. Then the fans chant yes again. HHH won’t do that because that isn’t what’s best for business (Can the drop that annoying saying?). Since a lot went wrong Monday, for this 1 time & he tells Orton to mark his words that there won’t be a second time. This 1 time HHH will accept Orton’s apology. Orton thanks HHH. Then he says that he knows HHH has his back. He always has (What?). Then Orton says that after everything went down on Monday Orton looked up & he saw something. He needs HHH to respond to what happened with this. They show HHH & Cena helping up Stephanie. All Orton wants is an explanation. Orton was lying right there in the ring, looking up at Stephanie & the director of operations standing next to Cena (I knew that was gonna come into play). What is Orton supposed to think? Orton is HHH’s man. After he beats Cena this Sunday every superstar in the back past & present will know that Orton is the greatest of the great. That he is the greatest superstar of this generation or any other. When he beats Cena this Sunday he will be the champion of champions. What Orton needs to know from HHH is if “the authority” has the same amount of faith in Orton as Orton has in himself. HHH tells Orton not to worry about it & they shake hands. Then HHH tells him that they know exactly where their faith lies. HHH leaves & Orton stands in the ring & looks up at the 2 world tiles to end the show. This was painful. I’m really tired of this HHH-Randy Orton angle.

I thought this was a good show for the most part. I liked the Daniel-Rowan match at the start & I also liked that Daniel got the better of The Wyatts here. Bray’s promo on the Tron later was good too. The HHH-Orton in ring segment at the end was a crappy way to end the final show before TLC. That segment really dragged. Cena’s promo though was really good. The Usos vs. Rollins & Reigns was also good & I liked Punk’s post match promo on the Tron. The Divas tag match was decent & short, Henry-Sandow was too short to be much of a match & Big Show-Ryback was ok for what it was. The Rhodes Brothers vs. The Real Americans was also good. I’m not sure what the point of the Kofi-Miz feud is but having Miz take out Kofi before Kofi’s match with Del Rio was ok for what it was. Overall though I thought this was a good show this week. They did a solid job with their final hype to TLC.