Coverage and thoughts on the May 31, 2013 episode of Smackdown
The show starts with Kane vs. WWE Tag Team Champion Seth Rollins. Kane gets the pin. This was a solid match & I liked that they started Smackdown with a match rather than the usual 15-20 minute promo. Reigns got on the apron but Kane grabbed his throat & shoved him off. The referee was distracted with Reigns & as Rollins went to the top rope Daniel shoved him off. Then Kane choke slammed Rollins for the win.
Rollins & Reigns complain to the referee about what happened. Then they go right to the next match. This is good. They started with a match & they’re going right to the next 1.
Daniel Bryan vs. WWE Tag Team Champion Roman Reigns. Reigns wins by DQ when Kane got involved. Daniel had Reigns in the no lock & Rollins helped Reigns get to the rope. Then Kane gave Rollins a big boot. Daniel breaks the hold & then Reigns shoves Kane in the face, which the referee missed because he was distracted with Daniel. Then Kane decked Reigns, the referee saw that & called for the bell. Afterwards Kane & Daniel bicker & Daniel pokes Kane’s chest. Kane leaves the ring & Daniel follows him up the saying he can do this on his own. The match was solid & I was ok with the Kane-Daniel quarrel afterwards.
Damien Sandow is in the ring. Last week he attempted to teach Sheamus as well as all the unwashed masses a lesson. He tells the fans to listen, he will speak slowly. That lesson was that physical strength is not now or ever will be superior to mental strength. This of course left the Irish brute dumb founded. Much like all the fans 25 years ago when they gave away Wayne Gretzky for nothing. Then he says that when it comes to intelligence he is the great one. Then he demands silence. To further illustrate his point he has devised this simple challenge. There’s a table in the ring again. This time the challenge is what the Ancient Greeks referred to as thimblerig. However the fans may know this as the shell game. He says that there’re 3 cups on the table & in his hand he has a ball. He says how this game is played & says that anyone with common sense can find the ball. However, here in the WWE he is surrounded by simple minds. Which is exactly why he…Cue Sheamus’ music & he comes out. He says that Sandow couldn’t leave well enough alone. Last week he tricked Sheamus with the knot puzzle & Sandow should’ve just walked away. But now Sandow is out here playing with his cups & his tiny balls (That was idiotic). Then Sheamus says that Sandow is just annoying everybody including him. Sheamus is prepared to put an end to this charade once & for all & beat Sandow at his own game. Sandow places the ball under a cup & then shuffles them around. Sandow finds the ball after every shuffle. Then after 1 more shuffle he tells Sheamus to pick which cup the ball is under & to chose wisely. Sandow taunts Sheamus and then Sheamus picks a cup & it’s the wrong one. Sandow asks if someone can tell him why he’s not surprised. Sheamus’ idiot license is good for another year but just because he likes Sheamus he is going to do what is called “dimwitify” this game. There’re 2 cups & 1 ball. Sandow tells him to make a choice. Sheamus picks 1 up & the ball is not there. Then Sandow says that Sheamus has once again proven himself to be incompetent. This concludes this evening’s challenge. Until next time this is your…Then Sheamus says that Sandow beat him at this little game but Sheamus won’t be happy till Sandow shows him the red ball under the remaining cup. Sandow says that Sheamus is a very simple man. Sheamus tells Sandow to take his hand off the cup. Sandow says that Sheamus will further embarrass himself in front of everybody. Sheamus has embarrassed himself quite a number of times but he won’t be satisfied & he is sure that the fans won’t be either. Sandow says that everybody here does not count. Then Sheamus screams silence at Sandow. Sheamus again tells Sandow to lift his hand off the cup. Sheamus yanks the cup & the ball is nowhere to be found. Sandow asks Sheamus if he really wants to do this as the fans chant show your ball(s). Sheamus doesn’t think anyone wants to see that. Sandow then asks if there is 1 adult in the crowed. Sandow reminds Sheamus that he is on TV & doesn’t wanna embarrass himself. Sheamus says that he knows. Sandow says that this is Sheamus’ last chance. Sheamus looks inside the cup & there’s no ball there. Then Sandow says that something about being a magician & there is no one close to his talent or some crap like that. Then Sheamus says that if Sandow truly is the intellectual savior of the unwashed masses how is it that he got caught cheating? Sheamus says that Sandow is so proud & so quick & is a perfect target for a Brogue Kick. Then he throws the cups at Sandow & then gives him a Brogue Kick. Then Sheamus kneels over Sandow and says you’re welcome. This segment was just as long & just as pointless as last week’s!
Curtis Axel & Paul Heyman come out. Heyman says there are those in WWE that will dare to insinuate that the way to see if he is lying is to check if his lips are moving. He says there’re a bunch of comedic geniuses in WWE. The fact is when Heyman speaks about his clients he always tells the truth. For example the fact that what Curtis Axel has accomplished in his first 2 weeks as a Paul Heyman guy is unprecedented in WWE history. But since the Smackdown fans have no appreciation for Heyman’s integrity he will allow Curtis to pontificate about his accomplishments himself. Curtis then says that Triple H & John Cena have a combined 26 championships, but against him they’re 0-2. He beat Triple H up so bad that he refused to continue, which technically counts as a submission. Cena was so afraid to fight him that he ran out of the ring intentionally getting himself counted out instead of fighting him. No one in WWE history has made the type of impact that he has. When you’re a Paul Heyman guy life is…PERFECT. This was good. Both guys cut good heel promos.
Sin Cara vs. Curtis Axel. Curtis gets the pin with the Perfectplex. This was a short but decent match.
Alberto Del Rio
Time for a look back at the Cena-Ryback promo followed by Paul Heyman & Curtis Axel from Monday. Then they show the Cena-Curtis match from the end of Raw.
An Ambulance pulls into the arena & out of the back of it comes Ryback.
Kofi Kingston vs. Ryback. Ryback gets the pin. This was actually longer than I expected it would be. Kofi got a lot of offense in here. Then Ryback gets a table from under the ring & power bombs Kofi through it. Then Ryback gets a second table out from under the ring & power bombs Kofi through that too. Then Ryback gets a third table & yep he power bombs Kofi through it. This was overkill with the tables.
Time for a look back at the highlight reel from Monday.
Backstage Renee Young interviews Chris Jericho. She says that Heyman accepted Jericho Jericho Jericho
Chris Jericho vs. Cody Rhodes. Jericho Jericho
Time for the Wyatt family vignette. This was actually pretty good. The gimmick looks creepy & I really hope WWE doesn’t botch it with these guys.
Randy Orton vs. U.S.
This week’s show was solid for the most part. I liked that they started the show with a match and then went right into the next match. Both Kane-Rollins & Daniel-Reigns were solid matches too & I was ok with the Kane-Daniel dissention afterwards. Orton-Ambrose was solid too & I liked the post match brawl. Daniel showed a lot of intensity here & he did a great job. The Paul Heyman-Curtis Axel promo was solid too. Both guys cut good heel promos. The Sheamus-Sandow segment was long & pointless. I have no idea why they have these bits with these 2. Del Rio-Langston was solid too. Kofi-Ryback was longer than I expected. Kofi got some offense in before losing. The bit with the tables was overkill though. The Cara-Curtis match was short but decent & Jericho-Cody was solid too but I knew Jericho would win. I liked the Wyatt family vignette too. That gimmick has potential. Let’s hope WWE realizes this too. So overall I thought this was a solid show.
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