1-21-13 Raw results and thoughts

Coverage and thoughts on the January 21, 2013 episode of Raw

They start the show with the video of Martin Luther King speech.

The actual show starts with Vickie Guerrero & Paul Heyman coming to the ring. Vickie says it’s her job to make sure the fans are entertained by her show. The fans might not like her but she is always a professional and will always do the right thing. As a leader doing the right thing isn’t the same as doing the popular thing. Especially when it comes to The Rock. Heyman says he is out here in a show of unity & solidarity with Vickie. Last week on Raw 1 man took it upon himself to de-fame not only Heyman’s character but also the best & sexiest GM in the history of any TV show. That man of course is The Rock. Vickie says everyone should how atrocious Rock’s behavior was. The show Rock ragging on Heyman from the Rock concert last week. Heyman then says that it’s 1 thing to pick a fight with him because in 6 days Rock has to answer to CM Punk. But to pick a fight with Vickie is vile. Rock said things about Vickie that Heyman wouldn’t repeat in San Jose. Then they show Rock ragging on Vickie. Vickie is glad the fans enjoyed seeing Rock mock their appearances last week, but that won’t happen tonight. Rock is in San Jose but she has banned him from entering her arena. If he shows up he will be arrested. Then a production guy tells Vickie That Rock is there. Then they show Rock backstage with some cops. Rock says Vickie wants to screw the people and the people’s champion. He tells the cops he knows they got a job to do but there isn’t a force on this planet from Rock getting in the people’s ring tonight. 1 of the cops says if he does they’ll arrest him. Rock says they should arrest Punk for impersonating being WWE Champion. He tells them to arrest Heyman. Then he tells them not to arrest Vickie, but to ask her what her intestines look like. If Vickie thinks Rock’s not getting in the building tonight then she has her head right up her ass. Rock tells the cops that he is relentless and there’s no way he isn’t getting in that ring and electrifying the fans. Vickie says Rock might talk a tough game but all he will be singing is Jailhouse Rock. Then Vickie says, “If ya smell what The Vic is cookin.” This was a decent way to start the show. Heyman was good here & I thought Vickie was too. Rock of course was his usual comical self.

Tonight there be a beat the clock challenge. Whoever wins their match in the shortest time gets to pick what number they enter the rumble. Orton vs. Cesaro will be first. Why not just have the winner come in at # 30?

Randy Orton vs. U.S. Champion Antonio Cesaro in a beat the clock match. Orton gets the pin in 11:36. This was a solid match but having Cesaro lose cleanly was a mistake.

They show the Mick Foley Hall of Fame video package.

Time for a Shield video. Ambrose says it’s time for the fans to open there eyes. Rollins says if they fans don’t they will open them for them. The show clips of The Shield attacking guys with a voice over of video from Smackdown.

Brad Maddox hops the guardrail and does commentary.

Zack Ryder vs. Big Show. Big Show gets the pin. This was a really short and meaningless squash.   

Afterwards Big Show says he will give everyone a preview of what will happen in his last man standing match with Del Rio. He puts his foot on Ryder’s chest and starts counting. The fans what him and he flips out. He asks if they think he’s playing around.

Paul Heyman is backstage on his cell phone. He’s telling someone there’s no way Rock is getting in the building. Then Maddox comes in. He says he has always wanted to be famous and there’s nothing he wouldn’t do to keep his dreams alive. Heyman says he admires Maddox and tells Maddox that if he sticks with him he will make Maddox famous. Then Maddox says “Back to the studios.” This was ok. Maddox had his camera man there again. I thought Heyman was good here. I’m not sure if they’ll actually have him manage Maddox.

Ryback vs. Heath Slater. Ryback gets the pin. This was a squash too. Ryback also took care of Drew & Jinder. Then Ryback says that his job is fun. Sunday is his first rumble match. It’s a match he was made for, a match he will thrive on and a match that will lead him to the main event of WrestleMania. “Feed me more.” The promo was nice & short.

Back to Rock with the cops. Rock says they’ve been there an hour. He’s gotta get in the ring. Rock tells them they’re not wearing the badges to protect and serve Vickie, but to protect and serve the people. Rock says you know what it gets when he comes out. He says the fans will be chanting his name. Cue the Rocky chant. Rock says it’s about the people. A cop says he has a ticket and his wife and kid are in the crowd. Then Vickie comes by and another cop says that as long as he’s out there he isn’t breaking any rules and they can’t arrest him. Vickie tells Rock Punk will be inside the ring addressing the people next. Vickie can lift the band if Rock apologizes. Rock says there’s 2 problems with that. He will get in the ring on his terms, not hers, and she still looks horrible tonight. Vickie storms off. Then Rock tells the cops that he has an idea. This was a decent bit. Rock will of course be in the people’s ring by the end of the show.

CM Punk & Paul Heyman come to the ring. Punk says that what he has he holds more dear to his heart than most people hold their families. This has been his life’s work & that for 428 days he has proven that he is the man. He’s worked half his life to get the most prestigious title that WWE has to offer. He will not allow Rock or anyone to take it from him. Rock is there to entertain, electrify, sing and tells jokes. Punk is there to hurt people and be champion. He will not allow Rock to become champion because he has made the belt prestigious. What’s prestigious to Rock is the most meaningless thing possible. The fans who chant for him. Rock’s proud to be people’s champion, almost as proud as Punk is to be a real champion. He’s looked Rock right in the eye and he sees why he’s proud of being the people’s champion. It’s because Rock knows he can’t be WWE Champion. Punk was forced to make a choice between hypocrytcial humility or arrogant honesty. Punk chose honesty while Rock foolishly chose the people. Punk says the title belongs to him and he has earned the right to be the man. In 6 days this is what Rock is on a collision course with. He tells Rock to enjoy being the people’s champ. He wants him to slap their hands. Then he says that the people don’t matter. The title is all that matters. In 6 days it doesn’t matter if he smells what The Rock is cooking. What the people can’t give Rock will remain around the waist of the WWE Champion, the best in the world, CM Punk. Punk holds the title over his head. This was a really good promo.

The Miz vs. Dolph Ziggler in a beat the clock challenge. Dolph gets the pin in 10:56. This was a good back and forth match. Miz had Dolph in the figure 4 but then AJ got on the apron and distracted the referee. While that was happening, Big E dragged Dolph to the ropes. Then Dolph hit Miz with the Zig Zag for the win.

Time for Kane & Daniel Bryan’s anger management graduation ceremony. This is gonna be terrible.

Shelby is in the ring with his Genius get up. They got diplomas in the ring. Shelby says he’s so proud of Kane & Daniel. Now he’d like to introduce the first graduates of Shelby’s anger management program and the tag team champions. Out come Kane & Daniel Bryan in graduation gowns. Shelby wants to look at how far they’ve come. Kane was a maniacal mask wearing monster and Daniel was a tightly wound little man child, who would snap if anyone called him goat face or if anyone said that his beard looks like a hotel for rats. But now they’re calm and ready to graduate. Then he gives them both the caps & diplomas. Shelby says the valedictorian gets to talk about their feelings. Since he doesn’t give grades he asks them which 1 should be valedictorian? Kane says it should be Daniel. Daniel screams no. Daniel says it should be Kane. Then they both go back and forth about who should speak and do the same old bit. Shelby asks them if a hug would make him feel better. Shelby says how about everyone everywhere hugs at the same time. Kane asks what about Cole & Lawler. Cole & King hug. Then Daniel says what about Justin Roberts and Dr. Sampson. They hug. Daniel points out 3 guys in the crowed, then a guy with a yes t-shirt. Then Kane points out more fans. This painfully continues as Kane, Daniel & Shelby scream for all the fans to hug each other. Then the 3 of them group hug and jump up and down. This was so idiotic!! I’m really hoping that we’re finished with this angle! Why was this on the go home show for the rumble!? It had nothing to do with the rumble. I thought maybe Cody & Sandow would come out & give some build to the tag title match but nope. Not even that.

Divas Champion Kaitlyn vs. Alicia Fox. Kaitlyn gets the pin. This was ok. Tamina watched on a monitor backstage.

Backstage Heyman tells Punk that he has a luxury sky box for him. Heyman tells Punk that he has personal message for The Rock. It won’t be a pipe bomb, but a “Paul bomb” and it’s dedicated to Punk.

Heyman is in the ring. He says that a lot of fans might not know this. He’s not only the voice of the voice of the voiceless but he’s also Punk’s friend and advisor. He says Punk’s promo from earlier went over the fans’ heads. So tonight he will also be Punk’s interpreter. So many fans think it’s a forgone conclusion Rock is leaving rumble WWE Champion, but he’s not. Vince is a tyrant and is desperate for anyone to beat Punk for the title and the flavor of the month is The Rock. In 6 days Rock is facing the longest reigning WWE Champion for the past 25 years. Then he says that The Rock, just like the people are stupid. Then Rock’s music hits and he comes out with the ticket the cop had (Then why not come out through the crowed?). Punk watches from the sky box and Rock looks up at him. Rock thanks the cops for the ticket. Heyman says that ticket doesn’t entitle him to…Rock tells Heyman to get out of the ring or he will slap the taste right out of his mouth. Heyman leaves the ring. Then Rock says Punk’s been WWE champion for 428 days. He knows how tough Punk is. Punk has earned the right to call himself the best in the world. It doesn’t change the fact that tonight is his last night on Raw WWE Champion. Rock says Punk’s obsessed with how proud he is to entertain the fans. The fact is Punk has a guy who will stand before him and rip his face off. Rock’s waited 10 years for this shot. Blood sweat and respect. Just like Martin Luther King had a dream, Rock has a dream to 1 more time be WWE Champion. If Punk saw into Rock’s soul then Punk knows that Rock promised to beat him for the title at the rumble. When that’s done, Sunday night, every fan around the world will be saying, “Free at Last.” “If ya smell what The Rock is cookin.” Then the lights go out and when they come back on The Shield are triple teaming Rock. Rock fights back but they get the upper hand. Then they give Rock the triple power bomb. Punk says that on top of the mountain there’s only room for 1 man. Then he says that you have to pay a price for freedom. He then says that when Rock wakes up from his dream the great 1 will realize that he just wasn’t great enough to beat the best in the world. Rock lies in the ring with his mouth bloodied while Punk holds the title over his head. This was really good. Heyman & Rock were both great on the mic as usual. I liked that they had The Shield come in and attack The Rock. I wasn’t expecting that. Punk’s promo about the great 1 not being great enough to beat the best in the world was a good line too!

They show a Martin Luther King video. This was classy.

Sheamus vs. Intercontinental Champion Wade Barrett in a beat the clock challenge. The match goes to a draw. Dolph, Big E & AJ came out during the match; AJ got in the ring and distracted Sheamus. So Dolph wins the beat the clock challenge.

Vickie Guerrero is in the GM office. Dolph, Big E & AJ come in and Dolph brags that he gets to pick his spot in the rumble. Then he sings how wonderful AJ looks. Dolph says he might pick # 30. He might pick # 27, since that number has won 4 times. Then he says that he doesn’t need luck. Vickie then tells him that he only pick numbers 1 or 2. How can Vickie make that decision?

Punk & Heyman are backstage. Heyman says it’s time for The Rock to know his role and shut his mouth. Then the walk into Vince. Punk says he had nothing to do with The Shield. Vince says that if The Shield gets involved in the title match at the rumble, Vince will come up with some consequences. Heyman says The Shield hasn’t just interfered on Punk’s behalf. They’ve attacked Orton & Sheamus too. There’s no evidence against Punk. Vince says that if he finds any evidence (meaning if The Shield gets involved in the match on Punk’s behalf), then he will strip Punk of the WWE Title. Vince walks off & Heyman tells Punk that he warned him about Vince. This was decent.

World Champion Alberto Del Rio vs. Tensai. Del Rio gets the pin. This was a squash. Then Del Rio tells Big Show there will be a 10 count at the end of the last man standing match, but it won’t be Big Show counting, Del Rio will be. Then he and the fans count to 10 in Spanish.

Time to find who the next 2013 WWE Hall of Famer will be. It’s Bob Backlund. They show a video package highlighting his career. Backlund is also a very deserving first ballot Hall of Famer!

John Cena comes to the ring. He says the fans are a lively bunch because they had a restful weekend. Traditionally Sunday has been a day to rest. Everyone enjoys Sundays. He talks to some kid and he says that the kid is beating him at vid games or whatever. His user name is skid marks 187. Then he goes to some chick. Her Sunday is probably reliving her Saturday. She probably goes to the gym, goes home and serf youtube and more irrelevant crap. Then he says he’s lived some other guy’s Sunday. Waking up at 1:30 and he talks about blow up dolls (Man this guy’s promos are absolutely horrendous). This Sunday is the Royal Rumble. If you win the rumble you got a golden ticket to the main event of WrestleMania. This Sunday history can be made and it will be an all out war. This Sunday all the fans’ eyes fall on the Royal Rumble. The world will find out what he already knows. This Sunday he will win the Royal Rumble. Then out comes Sheamus. He says Cena’s got it all wrong. He will win the rumble just like last year. Then out come The Primetime Players. Titus asks Sheamus what he is talking about. Then out comes Orton. He came out to tell everyone that they’re looking at the man who will win the rumble. Then out comes The Miz. He gives a few reallys and says he’s winning the rumble and will main event WrestleMania again. Then out come Kane & Daniel Bryan. Daniel mentions how everyone’s arguing over who will win the rumble. Kane mentions how childish that that is. Everyone knows he’s winning. Daniels says he’s winning. Then Cesaro comes out. He will dedicate winning the rumble to the U.S. Then out come 3MB. Heath asks if they think they’re winning the rumble. Drew says they’re delusional. Jinder says when of them will make history after winning the rumble. Slater asks what they think about that. Then the rest of the locker room comes out and a brawl starts in the ring. Guys get thrown over the top rope as the “pre rumble” continues and this ends the show. Cena’s promo was his typical Cena idiocy. I don’t know why he continues to cut these kinds of promos. I liked having all the other guys come out saying they will win (though Drew McIntyre calling them all delusional was ironic, since 3MB have no chance of winning). The pre rumble brawl at the end was good too.

I thought this was a decent show overall. I liked that they had the beat the clock challenge but having Dolph win and then having Vickie tell him that he can only pick numbers 1 or 2 was underwhelming. Orton-Cesaro was solid but I think having Cesaro lose cleanly to Orton is a mistake. Miz-Dolph was good and Sheamus-Barrett was too, but I wasn’t a fan of the match ending in a draw. Cena’s promo was the usual hokey nonsense we get from him. The brawl at the end was good. The Rock-Heyman-Punk segment was really good too. They did a good job with the final build to their match at the Rumble. I liked The Shield coming out and attacking Rock too. I’m glad Bob Backlund will be inducted into the Hall of Fame this year. Ryback-Slater, Ryder-Big Show & Del Rio-Tensai were all squashes. I’m not sure why the Ryback-Slater match wasn’t a beat the clock challenge since they’re both in the rumble too. Kaitlyn-Alicia Fox was ok. The Anger management graduation was totally meaningless. I thought Cody & Damien would come out but that didn’t happen. The backstage bit where Vince told Punk & Heyman that if The Shield got involved in the title match on Punk’s behalf he’d strip Punk of the title was decent too. The Vickie-Heyman promo at the start of the show was alright too and I thought the Heyman-Maddox bit in the back was ok. On the whole I thought this was a decent show.