4-1-13 Raw results and thoughts

Coverage and thoughts on the April 1, 2013 episode of Raw

The show starts with John Cena coming to the ring. He says he stands in the middle of a house divided. Ironically enough it’s in Washing D.C. Home of the Democrats & Republicans. All eyes are focused on Mania. It’s no secret he & Rock don’t like each other but Cena respects Rock & Rock is worthy of being called WWE Champion. Last year he would’ve questioned Rock’s allegiance to WWE and then Rock would mock him. Those childish games are over because we all know this is much bigger. Rock is the WWE Champion. Rock has come back and has done everything that he said he would do. Tonight Cena will not waste his breath Dwayne’s Johnson. He gets in the ring with The Rock a guy he believes is the greatest WWE Champion ever. That makes it impossible for him to win. Just like winning the rumble & beating Punk. Rock is the great one but at Mania Rock will fall. Rock’s time is up, Cena’s time is now. This Sunday at WrestleMania the fans (who chant Cena sucks) might get a moment they never thought they’d see. Rock says he can cope with failure. When Cena lost to Rock he had to deal with that for a year and had to watch Rock usher in the People’s Era. He had to watch Rock debut a new championship designed for him, saying he will be champion. That night Rock shined up his faithful 13 turned it side ways and shoved it right in his own mouth. This Sunday Cena gets redemption and Rock will lose the title. The people’s era will remain and so will the fans, but the mighty Rock will experience failure and have to wake up every single day talk to the millions and every time WWE is mentioned he will realize that a title intended for him will be defended by Cena. Cena wants to hold the title as a symbol (the fans chant boring). Not just as a symbol that he is Rock’s equal but he’s better than Rock. This Sunday Cena will shock the world. The belt might have been made for Rock but THE CHAMP IS HERE! This was a solid promo to start the show. I thought Cena cut a good promo here.

Michael Cole films a live TOUT of Jerry Lawler making his prediction for Rock-Cena 2. He picks Rock.

Randy Orton, Sheamus & Big Show vs. 3MB. Orton, Sheamus & Big Show win when Big Show pins Jinder. This was a squash. Then The Shield’s music hit and they show up in the crowd. Ambrose sarcastically congratulates them on that big win. He tells them to enjoy it now because Sunday The Shield won’t leave them with anything to celebrate with. They’ll leave them lying on their backs & Orton, Sheamus & Big Show will wonder what went wrong. Rollins says Orton, Sheamus & Big Show finally managed to convince themselves and the fans that they’re on the same page but unfortunately for them justice never lies and they know the truth. Reigns says the truth is they’re not a team. The fans want to believe in them but their team is phony and at WrestleMania the whole world will believe in The Shield. This was a good Shield promo.

Time for an earlier in the day video form Swagger & Coulter. Zeb says that like Ricardo’s ankle this country is broken. Luckily Swagger knows how to fix it. Swagger says that great empires have crumbled because the people became weak. The boarders have weakened & resources have been exploited. He says he & Zeb know why and so do the fans. At WrestleMania real change is coming. Swagger will not only break Del Rio’s ankle but he will break the spirits of everybody who has tried to duck the American Dream (Not Dusty Rhodes). Del Rio will witness change first hand as an American stands over him as world champion. If people don’t like they don’t deserve to be Americans. Welcome to Jack Swagger’s America. Thankfully this was short.

Matt Striker is backstage with Del Rio. Striker asks him about Swagger’s video. Del Rio says America is the land of opportunity and one of the rights is freedom of speech. Swagger has that right but if Del Rio doesn’t like what he says he can do something about it. Zeb is a piñata with a mustache that he will break tonight. This was a solid promo.

WWE Tag Team Champion Daniel Bryan vs. Dolph Ziggler. Dolph gets the pin. This was a good match. AJ skipped around Kane and then Big E tackled him. Then Daniel gave Big E a base ball slide and then Dolph rolled up Daniel for the pin. Afterwards Langston attacks Daniel & gives him the big ending. Then Kane goes after Dolph & Big E. He grabs Langston by the throat but Langston powers out and gives Kane the big ending too. Then AJ gets in the ring with the tag titles and hands them to her guys. Dolph & Big E pose with the titles.

Shawn Michaels comes to the ring. The fans chant HBK. Shawn says WrestleMania can’t happen without Mr. WrestleMania. He loves this time of year. We got Del Rio-Swagger, Taker-Punk and Rock-Cena in the main event for the WWE Title. The fans know that’s not why Shawn’s here. He’s interested in the HHH-Lesnar match. There’s a ton of history between Brock & Hunter. Shawn & his arm are part of that history. HHH has put his career on the line & Shawn questions if Hunter can beat Brock. Then out comes Triple H. HHH & HBK hug. Then HHH says before Shawn goes too far, Hunter says he knows what he’s doing. Shawn says he doesn’t think Hunter knows what he’s doing. Hunter’s under the impression that his situation is the same as Shawn’s but Shawn says they couldn’t be more different. Shawn was heartbroken when he lost his career match and he knows Taker was heartbroken too. Brock doesn’t respect HHH, Shawn, the fans, no one. Their situations aren’t similar. Brock does this because he enjoys wreaking havoc. Shawn used to think this job was his life but when he met Hunter he realized the business is Hunter’s life because he cares more about it that Shawn ever did. Shawn says that Hunter is putting his life on the line. Hunter tells Shawn to save his breath because he’s not talking him out of this. Shawn says Hunter better kick Brock’s ass at Mania. Unlike SummerSlam Shawn will be at ringside to watch him do it. If you not down with that Shawn’s got 2 words…Cue Brock’s music & he & Heyman come out. Heyman says for the record Brock has 2 words for them but it’s not the 2 words they’re looking for. Brock is going to beat HHH into retirement this Sunday at WrestleMania. He understands how much that disappoints all the fans. Hunter will have to learn to live with all of that disappointment. Hunter will disappoint Vince because he won’t be able to fight Vince’s battles. He will also disappoint the board of directors because he won’t be able to his job as COO. He will also disappoint Stephanie but she’s probably used to that. Hunter will disappoint Shawn too. Heyman asks Shawn if he wants to be this close to HHH when Brock beats HHH down again and when Brock breaks Shawn’s arm again. Heyman says Shawn will be disappointed in his best friend. Brock picked this fight & HHH answered the call. Heyman says that HHH should’ve walked away because when Brock’s done with him he will crawl with his tail between his legs and will have disappointed everyone. All because he couldn’t beat Brock. Heyman then says that HHH will never beat Brock. The same Brock that caused Triple H to commit career suicide. This was a good segment. Shawn & Hunter were both good on the mic here & Heyman’s promo was good as usual too.

The Miz is on commentary. They mention that The Miz-Wade Barrett match will be on the youtube pre show.

Zack Ryder vs. Intercontinental Champion Wade Barrett. Barrett gets the pin. This was a decent match but I knew Barrett was going to win.

We see Brad Maddox & Vickie Guerrero in the GM office. Then in comes Santino. He says Vince is there and is mad Brad & Vickie. Vickie says Vince likes her. Santino then says it was an April fool’s joke. Vickie & Brad don’t find that funny. Vickie tells Santino that he is in a match next and Brad says Santino is the fool. This was a lame bit.     

Santino Marella vs. Mark Henry. Henry gets the pin. This was quick squash. Then Ryback’s music hits and he comes out. Henry says he knows Ryback’s mad he couldn’t break Mark’s bench record but that doesn’t mean he can threaten him. They have a no contact clause till Mania. Also no one wants to get their hands on Ryback more than he does. He knows that Ryback wants to get his hands on him too, but tonight isn’t the night. Tonight it’s time to smile. As Henry goes to leave the ring Ryback throws Santino into Henry & Mark falls out of the ring. Then Ryback press slams Santino onto Henry on the outside. Then Ryback says that he never touched Henry. This was solid.

Backstage Matt Striker is with CM Punk. Striker asks Punk if he feels he is disrespecting Paul Bearer’s memory. Punk says he’s trying to get in Taker’s head. He is going to do what no one has managed to do. End Taker’s streak. The difference between Punk and every other Taker Mania opponent is that he will do whatever it takes. Maybe Taker will get DQ’d, counted out or maybe Punk will make him tap. He says that after WrestleMania every time someone thinks about WrestleMania they will think about Punk. Punk was good here but I’m uncomfortable with Paul Bearer’s passing being in this storyline.

World Champion Alberto Del Rio vs. Zeb Coulter. Del Rio wins by DQ. Swagger goes after Ricardo’s ankle & Del Rio gives Swagger a baseball slide. Then Zeb hits Del Rio with a crutch leading to the DQ. Then Swagger gets Del Rio from behind and then he & Zeb hit Del Rio with Ricardo’s crutches. This was decent too.

The Rock comes to the ring. He says connection between the people’s champ & the people is the only reason why he’s standing in the ring. This Sunday isn’t about redemption. It’s about the will of the people. The will of the people isn’t for Cena to get redemption, but for Rock to stomp Cena’s monkey ass all over WrestleMania. The will of the people is bigger than Cena could ever imagine. If people will it they can change the world. Maybe rather than Rock visiting this town he will have to live in it. He would live in a big White House and maybe we go from President Barrack to President The Rock. Rock asks the fans if he can count on their vote. They cheer. Rock says that will be a historic moment and he will start off his speech by saying, “Finally The Rock has come back to Washington D.C.” Rock mentions Cena came out earlier and the same things he said last year and Cena got beat. Last week he got in Rock’s face and was Rock Bottomed. Cena’s time isn’t now. His time is never. This isn’t about redemption or passing the torch. The only way Cena gets this torch is if he pours gasoline on it, sets fire to it and shoves it up Cena’s candy ass. Cena’s not just facing Rock; he’s facing Rock and the millions of his fans. Rock’s found what he’s looking for. Rock lives for that connection. Rock says that you can not deny the will of the people & that Cena can not beat The Rock. “If ya smeeeeeeeeeel what The Rock…is cookin’” This was a good Rock promo.  

Chris Jericho vs. U.S. Champion Antonio Cesaro. Jericho wins by submission. Fandango’s music played and he & his chick came out. They danced on the stage as Jericho watched. Then they went to commercial. (How come when there’s a match in the ring and someone’s music plays whoever’s in the ring has to get distracted by their entrance?) Back from commercial and the match continued. They showed Fandango giving this match a 2 from during the break. Then Fandango gave the match a 4. Then he walked down the ramp holding up a 3. Then he held up the 4 again. Then Jericho gave Fandango a base ball slide and Fandango’s score cards went flying. Then Jericho got the walls on Cesaro for the submission win. Afterwards Fandango comes in and pounds on Jericho & the fans tell Fandango that he can’t wrestle. Then Fandango gives Jericho a top rope leg drop and screams at Jericho to say his name. Then he gives him a second top rope leg drop. Then he gets the mic & says his name. The match was good but Cesaro lost another non title match cleanly. The Fandango beat down on Jericho was good too.

Time for some fans TOUTS giving their picks for the Rock-Cena match.

Brodus Clay, Sweet T Tensai, Naomi & Cameron come to the ring. Naomi & Cameron have a match next. Commercial time.

Back from commercial and out come Rhodes Scholars & The Bella Twins.

Naomi & Cameron vs. The Bella Twins. The Bella Twins win when Brie pins Cameron. This was actually a decent match.

The Undertaker comes to the ring. He says Punk’s historic title reign lasted well over 400 days but the pain waiting on him at Mania will last an eternity. Punk decided to make this personal and Punk will suffer. Beating Punk at Mania is no longer good enough. The disrespect Punk’s shown Bearer will cost him the ultimate price. Punk might be right, in Taker’s frame of mind the streak might end but Punk will never live to talk about it. Cue the Druid music and Taker’s lighting & out come the druids. Taker stands in the ring as the druids stand on the stage. The music keeps playing & Taker’s lighting is still going. Then we hear “Oh Yes.” Out comes Paul Heyman dressed as Paul Bearer. Taker goes up the ramp after him, stops in his tracks and then attacks the druids. Then we find out one of the druids is Punk. Heyman gives Punk the urn & he hits Taker with it screaming it’s over. Punk tells “Hocus Pocus” to sit up for him. He says 20-1 and “I did this to you.” He continues to hit Taker in the back with the urn. Then Punk takes the lid off the urn and pours out sand on Taker. Then Punk says it’s all over at WrestleMania. Punk kneels & holds up the urn as Taker lies on the ramp to end the show. This was good but as I’ve said before I really find Paul Bearer’s passing being the focus of this to be in bad taste. Their match at Mania should be good though.

I thought this was a good show overall. They did a solid job in the final build to WrestleMania. Cena’s promo at the start was good and Taker’s promo was good too. I thought Punk being disguised as a druid and then attacking Taker was solid also. The Jericho-Cesaro match was good too but once again Cesaro cleanly lost a non title match. Fandango attacking Jericho afterwards was good too. I think they’ll have a good match at WrestleMania. Naomi & Cameron vs. The Bella Twins was better than I thought it would be. Ryder-Barrett was decent & Ryder got some offense in but I knew Barrett would win. The Santino-Brad-Vickie backstage bit was weak & Santino-Henry was a squash. Orton, Sheamus & Big Show vs. 3MB was a squash too but I liked The Shield’s promo afterwards. That match should be enjoyable too. I wasn’t into the Swagger-Coulter video but thankfully it was short. Del Rio-Coulter wasn’t really a match. This was about continuing the Del Rio-Swagger feud & I thought they did a good job here. Del Rio-Swagger could be a solid to good match too. The Michaels-Triple H segment was good also. Both guys were good on the mic here. Heyman’s promo was good to of course. I also like the Daniel-Ziggler match & The Rock’s promo was good too. So on the whole I thought they did a good job with the final build to WrestleMania.